Today, I went to get my nails done for the first time in a while. I don't like to go that much because two of my toes are connected, and I'm very self-conscious about it. The man painting my toes started laughing when he saw them and called all the other employees over to look. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went to get a pedicure for the first time. My feet are VERY ticklish. I reflexively kicked the poor lady in the face, as I wet my pants. FML
Today, I decided to treat myself to a pedicure ahead of my cousin's wedding. The woman doing my nails asked if I wanted my toe hairs trimmed. I was so taken aback and embarrassed that I said yes. They charged me extra. FML
Today, I was with a wedding party getting manicures. I absentmindedly used a freshly-painted nail to pick my nose and ended up with two beauticians scraping indestructible bright red gel varnish out of my left nostril with acetone soaked q-tips, while everyone sat waiting in complete silence. FML
Today, at my annual checkup, the doc looks down at my foot and says, "Oh, you have an extra toenail. Six, huh?" Then sort of scraping at the side of my foot below the pinky toe, he pulls off a long piece of dead, dried skin and says, "Oh." FML
Today, I went to get my first manicure. While waiting, I looked at the menu board. When I wondered aloud: "I know what a French manicure is, but what on Earth is a Polish change?" The whole place started laughing and I guess I'm not going back. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought this hot pink Chanel nail polish. Bored, she thought it would be funny to paint my nails. I finally gave in and let her paint my toe nails. After she left, my buddy calls to to see if I can give him a ride. I forgot I had a swim meet today. FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure, and they used some sort of scrubby thing that really tickled my feet. When I couldn't take it any more, I accidentally kicked the lady who was doing my nails in the face. FML
Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me how he used to collect little things when he was younger. He then decided to tell me about his current big toe nail collection. FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure to cheer myself up. I've been so lonely, I got overly excited when someone sat next to me, because I got to pretend I had a friend. FML
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Top comments
EvilPotato 15
File a complaint on their asses!
iRoc46n2 4
Just tell them you're genetically superior
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Comments (203)
heneveli 6
I have connected toes too and the only time they have bothered me was in the 90's when toe socks were hip and cool.
DontSaveMe 16
Aww I'm sorry OP I have 2 connected toes and they're annoying enough as it is without getting them LAUGHED AT! But I'm not a girly girl so I don't wear open-toe shoes or get pedicures or anything so I guess that's an upside... Still, they are disrespectful bitches and you should've left right there and then :(
SexyMexi21 23
Should have kicked him in the face
fantasyworld 39
I'm sorry. Get them fired.
stupidfool97 4
old post I know but having webbed toes is cool I have 2 on each foot which granted is weird but nothing to be embarrassed about :)
fucktard56 11
One of my best friend has those. Its really cute because they look like hearts
finian1108 19
I have webbed toes
jasonswife423 18
I have a similar problem. I was born with 2 different thumbs, one is long and slender, while the other is short and wide. I have only been to a salon to get my nails done twice my whole life and both times the chicks doing my nails made a big deal out of it and called ppl over. So I feel your pain, but don't let it bother you! It just makes you unique.
fml1052 10
Don't be ashamed, be proud of your differences. Show them off and learn to laugh and entertain with it.