Today, I went to get a tattoo. I decided on getting my four month daughter's name tattooed on my upper arm. I went home to show my wife. She broke down and told me that I'm most likely not the father. It's a toss-up between her co-worker, the guy who does our lawn, several strangers and me. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I got a tattoo with my boyfriend's name on it. As we're coworkers, I showed it to him thinking he’d love it. He told me he couldn’t continue the relationship anymore since he realized he wants to fix things with his wife. Three hours of pain and 2 years down the drain. FML
Today, I went to get a tattoo of my girlfriend's name to surprise her. Halfway through the tattooing, she called and broke up with me. FML
Today, I got my first tattoo. It was a surprise for my fiancé: our names together over a heart. I went home but before I could show him, he said we had to have a "talk." So now my ex's name is tattooed on my back. The kicker? Turns out I'm allergic to the ink. FML
Today, I found out that my wife is leaving me for a tattoo artist. I was in rehab and she met him getting a tattoo as a surprise for me. FML
Today, my dad found out I got a tattoo behind his back and is really really upset. When I got home from work my car wasn't in the driveway. When I asked my dad where it was, he replied "you'll get it back when your tattoo comes off." FML
Today, I finally met my daughter's boyfriend. He has a face tattoo. FML
Today, I realized my husband and I have been fighting a lot lately, so to show him how much I care, I got a tattoo with his name on it. He hates it. FML
Today, my girlfriend got a new tattoo - the Blink-182 logo on her stomach. I wouldn't mind it, except she got pregnant a month ago and I'm pretty sure that it can't good for the baby. FML
Today, I decided I was going to dump my needy girlfriend. I was about to break the news when she stopped me. She showed me her new tattoo she had gotten. Our names, surrounded by a love heart spread across her back. She reckons I should get a matching one. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me for the tattoo artist who gave us our matching "love" tattoos. FML
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Top comments
yake12 0
wow! normally I would say ydi for getting a name tattoo but kids are different!! well someone else may be the father but if you raise her properly you can be her dad
hellokimmiee 5
ouch, that hurts
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Comments (255)
hellokimmiee 5
ouch, that hurts
I_R_Genius 3
Be happy OP, my dad tells me it was either the beer man or the mail man. But, I go with the mail man because I know he makes a lot of "deliveries."
prinzess_fml 25
And it might hurt even more when he gets tested for STDs
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
I got 3 to 1 on the sexy latino lawn mower man hunk.
I_R_Genius 3
No #28 I know who my dad is and he justs likes to mess around with me and say that. It's a joke but I guess you haven't heard of it.
Blue_Coconuts 7
Well the mail man does always handle with care, as well as being used to handling large packages. I could see why your dad would pick him.
emmanizzer 6
ha i always said it was the milk man :)
emmanizzer 6
ha i always said it was the milk man :)
skiier4life 1
dude, what's mine say? sweet what's mine sat? dude! whats mine say? sweet! what's mine say? dude where's my car FTW?
Suavis 4
yeah 87, but how does that apply here?
Suavis 4
what does that have to do with anything?
dre_bro11 12
OP, she's still your daughter no matter what. even if not biologically, you've been with her since she was born... but your wife on the other hand...
Iskaria 0
Time to go on Maury ;D
Dr_PooPingDung 0
Faternity test?
Tempuser117 2
I don't think you can take that test until they are in college.
MissBoo111 21
no you can take it even while there still in the womb and stuff but they have to be in like the 3rd trimester or somethin
FiFiLovee 26
No offence OP, but your wife is a *****.
why57why 21
Not just a ***** but ******* thotomis prime
yake12 0
wow! normally I would say ydi for getting a name tattoo but kids are different!! well someone else may be the father but if you raise her properly you can be her dad
percawesome 0
Yeah the whole cheating thing is more an FML than the tatoo. the tat just makes it more... not ironic but just cruel in general. Bit it's still OP's daughter. I doubt EVEN IF the parents get divorced (not saying they should or shouldn't) I don't think a father of four months is going to just give up his kid because she's the spawn of another man. that's just heartless.
penguin7 0
agreed
DjeePee 24
' I don't think a father of four months is going to just give up his kid because she's the spawn of another man. that's just heartless' But what if the other man wants his kid? What will OP become? Stepdad? No, because it's more than likely he will divorce the mother. So, technically, he will be nothing than the guy who took care of anothers person his kid for four months. OP's wife is heartless. The only thing OP can do is visit the child regularly, but what's the point? The child will remind him constantly about his cruel wife and the other man. Painful. OP, FYL. The only reason why I might vote on YDI (but I am not going to do it), is because it wasn't nice of you to get a tattoo without even telling your wife. It's an imporant decision, and in a relationship you don't take them alone. But that's one tiny YDI for a big FYL.
at1325 0
I agree names of significant others are stupid, but the name off what you believe at least is your child isn't. if I child is yours it is your forever and nothing can change that, so op you were in the right. your wife on the other hand was very wrong in what she did and really the several men she did as well. good luck. I fully support men prepared to man up and be a father, we need more men like that, really for all men to be like that before they lay down with a woman.
tygerarmy 35
Divorce, kick her out of the house/apartment. The kids yours, you've cared and loved it all this time, though I wouldn't fault you for leaving her with the kid, I'd just feel bad for the bastard. Get child support from the mom and if you're not the biological dad, from him too, he ****** your wife.
xgetxbentx 13
I agree with 103, except he shouldn't need his wife's permission to get a tattoo, it's HIS body. granted I don't see why he wouldn't just be like "hey I'm going to get a tattoo of our kid's name".... kind of a weird thing to hide. op - if you love the child and your wife isn't looking for the biological father, no one would blame you for still being there for the kid in which case you would be the dad in all ways but sharing DNA. you should leave your wife though, she's a *****.
stro88 6
**** the tattoo why would you need to make a "decision" together when it's your body. Obviously you didn't make the decision together for her to go smash burger with a grip of dudes. Drop that ho and move on brotha man.
Michaelaarnett 22
Why should he have to tell his wife? Its his body, and probably him that works for the money too. OP should leave his wife if the child isnt his. And dont call me heartless. His wife cheated on him.
15thPrestige 0
If people ask who the name on the tatoo isvjust say one of your girlfriends.
PurplePeeps 0
Are you retarded? Or just 13?
brycereid 0
18 FTW
jdawgg92 1
21 FTW
percawesome 0
31 FTW
BahahahLOL 0
31 FTW!
onepluszero 0
I agree with sexy here... sucks you didnt catch her cheating before you married... **** **** **** your life, man o man!!!
honeybunches88 5
Sorry for being ignorant here, but what does FTW mean? Is it just WTF backwards?
chuchurocket 4
for the win
schwiggidy 0
**** the *****
chetchatter 5
FTW = for the win
honeybunches88 5
Oh that makes a lot more sense.
smexykero 0
win.
DropDead77 11
win^^^ purplepeeps
0z6 0
woow you are gorgeous!!!
poolofblood 0
hahahahahaha
XoOxKaiRaWrxOoX 0
FTW- **** the world what r u twelve?
johnnyexpl0sion 0
No, he knew the whole time. That's why he married her..... Dumbass..
samicna 4
walk away!
GreeenEggsAndHam 7
slutty wife...
felipe87 2
yea, what a *****
Taipan_fml 0
Ludacris was right - you can't turn a hoe into a housewife.
RedPillSucks 31
But you can turn a hoe into a rake. OP got his ass raked!
Hunter148Cassie 0
I agree what a ***** and don't worry OP you helped raise the baby for four months other than what the sperm donor did.
anonymous100000 17
divorce should be the only option in this situation.
miss_sunshine716 0
wow. talk about *****.
freckles92 0
pretty much! what *****!
JE163 0
My thoughts exactly!
theonlysweetpea 10
I guess I'm glad I'm not a man. I'd be a wife beater for this shit! That's doin too much!
chippa 24
Beating is never acceptable. Cheating isn't either (especially with so many people, on a spouse, etc), but beating doesn't solve anything and is a very serious matter.
MuchDance90s 0
if you hit her in the right places, you're darn right it'd solve the cheating problem
chetchatter 5
34 = win
takeapieandrun 9
66 = win
teggman93 0
that's just to release the stress of the station
ashlehheartsyou 1
haha! me too!
puppytaco64 8
Sometimes you just gotta slap a hoe
TXCandy 3
whoreslutbitch!
Mirorbo 26
It took a tattoo to make her confess that? Honey, it looks like it's time to really rethink the marriage...
VickyG17 4
maybe she is a nymphomaniac..it's not her fault!
cradle6 13
71- that's just stupid. there's no excuse for cheating.
willsohn 0
DAMN!!!!!!!! I literally said that out loud. :O
Sweej 1
You're a tool.