Miscellaneous: Today, I went to bring my 92-year-old neighbor some cake we had...

By Nikki - 13/05/2015 00:33 - United States - Satellite Beach

Today, I went to bring my 92-year-old neighbor some cake we had just made. When I walked in, she was wearing pants. That's it. I stared blinking in shock for a few seconds before running away, yelling, "So sorry. I brought you cake. Real tired. Gonna sleep now. Bye." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 005

You deserved it 3 574

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/08/2009 19:28 - United States

Today, I lazily answered the door in my pajamas. It was my elderly neighbor asking to borrow a can opener. Despite the strange and unwarranted scowl she was giving me I obliged. It wasn't until after she had left that I notice my penis was completely sticking out through the flap in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 948

You deserved it 21 601

By nerdygirl101 - 13/03/2010 05:27 - United States

Today, I woke up in pajamas I have never seen before. Usually, I sleep naked, and I live alone in a locked apartment. Then, the elderly woman next door asked for her nightgown back. Apparently, I sleep-walked and knocked on all the doors in my hallway repeatedly. I'm moving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 688

You deserved it 4 311

By Anonymous - 04/11/2010 23:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I spent two hours making a cake that I'd promised my class for weeks. I boarded the train to school, but soon dozed off. A few minutes later, I awoke with a start and noticed a chunk of the cake missing and a homeless man next to me with frosting around his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 294

You deserved it 8 531

By Ihatemyjob - 18/03/2013 03:14 - United States - Vermilion

Today, at work, I walked in on a disoriented elderly woman eating nachos and cheese off the bathroom floor. She wasn't wearing any pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 630

You deserved it 3 116

By SURPRISE - 10/06/2009 00:13 - Canada

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. To surprise her, I told her that I was going away on business, and could not be there on her birthday. When I show up at her house to surprise her with a present and cake, she opens the door in her underwear, beside a man in his boxers. She was surprised. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 615

You deserved it 6 819

By Rachael - 30/11/2012 07:29 - Australia

Today, I was woken up by my elderly neighbor banging on my door at 2am. She needed "urgent" assistance as she had forgotten how to turn her TV off. I'd just fallen asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 117

You deserved it 1 876

By Anonymous - 08/10/2009 04:24 - Canada

Today, I was helping my elderly landlady (75 years old) carry in her groceries. She said "Thanks" and then handed me a notice of eviction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 545

You deserved it 5 281

By Ashley J. - 01/03/2009 22:04 - United States

Today, my family gathered at my 96 year old great-grandmother's surprise birthday party that was my idea. When she walked in, we surprised her so much that she literally had a heart attack. She is now in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 280

You deserved it 17 528

By unwanted - 26/11/2014 18:13 - Canada - Dollard-des-ormeaux

Today, I drove over an hour to my grandma's house for her birthday party. When she answered the door, her eyes went wide and she said angrily "No, not you!" and slammed the door shut in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 615

You deserved it 2 933

By nicholascageonyourface - 09/06/2013 05:13 - United States - Papillion

Today, I was delivering pizza. When I went up to the front door, an elderly lady answered. She was wearing a floral dress that went down to her shins and had a Nicolas Cage mask on with eye holes cut out. When I glanced behind her, I saw her cats had them too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 423

You deserved it 5 140

majesticous 29

Wednesday 13 May 2015 8:41

You didn't knock?

legendairy3000 16

Wednesday 13 May 2015 8:43

I see therapy in your future OP.

Comments

Mellowyellow15 10

Thursday 14 May 2015 0:24

Don't knock the knockers! ;)

BananaCoconutty 26

Thursday 14 May 2015 0:59

She's a cougar!

tdawg91 17

Thursday 14 May 2015 3:34

1: it's ok to be elderly AND a lesbian 2: it's her own house, Op is lucky the lady had pants on because I usually don't when I'm home alone

kstizzle_504 8

Thursday 14 May 2015 4:55

Is this the same granny that was eaten out or feeding her neighbor's cat, by chance? Haha!

miranderrr14 10

Thursday 14 May 2015 5:13

I mean at least she had pants.... You're lucky she had that. If it were my home I wouldn't have anything on, personally.

Ben12345_fml 18

Thursday 14 May 2015 5:39

I don't understand. You wrote "she was wearing pants". I'm confused

daddysgirl8 21

Thursday 14 May 2015 9:23

Yes. Let me just walk into my neighbor's house unannounced. Surely she won't be roaming around topless.

IDerive 12

Thursday 14 May 2015 14:24

You could have made the cake over there and saved money on the powdered milk

SarcasticAtheist 8

Saturday 23 May 2015 23:31

Your ran because of a pair of boobs... amd you're a girl... Genius!

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I agree, your life sucks 23 818

You deserved it 2 837

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You deserved it 2 470

The Top

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You deserved it 4 585

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I agree, your life sucks 1 699

You deserved it 245

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I agree, your life sucks 27 818

You deserved it 2 424

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I agree, your life sucks 33 492

You deserved it 4 243

Today, I took the train home. When seated, I suddenly noticed something wet on my seat. Without looking, I thought it was water since it was snowing outside. Guess again. It was vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 647

You deserved it 7 092

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I agree, your life sucks 2 335

You deserved it 7 548

Same thing different taste

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