Intimacy: Today, I was walking with and hugging my girlfriend at the same...

By Anonymous - 21/11/2010 08:01 - Mexico

Today, I was walking with and hugging my girlfriend at the same time. I tried to be funny and touched her breast, saying "Boob" in a silly voice. In reply, she slapped me in the crotch, saying "Dick" in the same voice. FML

agreeclassic 11 406

vote type 1 65 888

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By Anonymous - 16/01/2020 18:00

Today my girlfriend was on top during sex. I went to slap her butt, missed and nailed myself in the balls. We had to stop. She wouldn't stop laughing. FML

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By Anonymous - 17/07/2011 08:43 - United States

Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML

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By Racked - 01/03/2016 18:00 - United States - Corpus Christi

Today, I walked my girlfriend home. As I kissed her goodbye, I heard a high-pitched scream and turned just in time to see her little brother charge head-first into my nuts. All because I kissed her on the cheek. FML

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canadian_ftw 8

Sunday 21 November 2010 16:29

whenever an FML says 'I tried to be funny...' it's like an instant YDI.

cufaoil 11

Sunday 21 November 2010 16:22

well, you were acting like a dick, OP

Comments

mysticwater 0

Monday 22 November 2010 20:45

LOL I do that to my bf all the time. you guys never learn. our boobs hurt if you poke them! smart gf!

Mcgillicutty22 0

Monday 22 November 2010 22:21

dude, I know exactly how you feel.

wowzersselainee 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 3:38

lmfaooo u deserved it I woulda held on a little longer so u learned ur lesson ;) some of us have really sensitive boobs

MaidenNoMore 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 4:47

Yeah,c, u just DON'T do that

vollyball921 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 4:47

lmao xD

mattstermind93 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 5:20

I had the sane thing happen

GangstaGalahleio 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 5:53

haha this one made me laugh.

malteseassassin 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 9:19

**** that **** dump the bitch

Faleni 4

Tuesday 23 November 2010 11:11

awww op you have a funny gf!! she's a keeper!! p.s ydi lol

capnbzarr 43

Wednesday 24 November 2010 1:39

I love this GF of his. YDI, dork.

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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agreeclassic 944

vote type 1 93

Today, I got a reply to my Valentine's Day card that I sent to my girlfriend. I'll get the address right next time because her neighbor is really creeping me out now. FML

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Today, following the advice of not putting my wallet in my back pocket, I put my wallet in my jacket's chest pocket. I lost my jacket. FML

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Today, to eat healthy, I made myself a salad for lunch. While shaking the salad container, the lid popped off, sending lettuce, cucumbers and dressing all over my cubicle. My boss walked in just in time to see me wiping vinaigrette off of my keyboard. FML

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