Intimacy: I am clumsy!

I am clumsy!

By Anonymous - 16/01/2020 18:00

Today my girlfriend was on top during sex. I went to slap her butt, missed and nailed myself in the balls. We had to stop. She wouldn't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 400

You deserved it 3 179

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 20/06/2009 11:13 - Switzerland

Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 803

You deserved it 97 694

By Anonymous - 24/12/2012 19:44 - United Kingdom - Addlestone

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 836

You deserved it 6 346

Bad sign

By Anonymous - 30/12/2010 01:28 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 858

You deserved it 6 270

By ottawaaa - 27/01/2009 22:26 - Canada

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out to finish I slipped and ended up punching her in the stomach, I came while she was writhing in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 178

You deserved it 10 862

By Anonymous - 16/09/2009 05:19 - United States

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 281

You deserved it 5 630

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 09:53 - France

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 289

You deserved it 29 243

By civicman - 27/09/2009 02:19 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling on the couch with my girlfriend when I started to tickle her, she asked me to stop but I continued. She had a reaction, and kneed me in the happy sacks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 681

You deserved it 66 274

Deez nutz hurtz

By Anonymous - 11/03/2020 15:01

Today, I was about to have sex with my wife, so I walked into our room naked, but then whacked myself in the nuts with the door handle as I attempted to close it. She can't stop laughing, and I can't sit down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 087

You deserved it 525

Submission

By Anonymous - 24/11/2019 18:00 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I thought I'd be spontaneous and spice things up, and gave her a spank across the butt. She started crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 516

You deserved it 1 909

Feelings

By Anonymous - 29/07/2013 00:46 - United States - Beaumont

Today, my girlfriend and I were going at it doggy style, really fast, when she started laughing. I asked her what was so amusing and she giggled, "I can't feel anything in there." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 604

You deserved it 9 796

DarkAngelsBlade 25

Thursday 16 January 2020 21:15

I’m just trying to figure out how you could miss that badly. Like honestly reaching an entire arm and hand around and under her, seems impossible.

kenken5 16

Thursday 16 January 2020 20:54

Some people are into that, hard spanking, don’t judge

Comments

manb91gb 15

Thursday 16 January 2020 18:56

If you were going to slap her that hard, it's probably a good thing you missed cabron

kenken5 16

Thursday 16 January 2020 20:54

Some people are into that, hard spanking, don’t judge

DarkAngelsBlade 25

Thursday 16 January 2020 21:15

I’m just trying to figure out how you could miss that badly. Like honestly reaching an entire arm and hand around and under her, seems impossible.

RichardPencil 30

Friday 17 January 2020 0:14

You need to take a few easy practice swings before going all out for real. Haven't you ever played golf?

distortedcognition 17

Friday 17 January 2020 4:31

Are you trying to say her ass is small or your balls are large? Seems like a stupid story

Kerensky 17

Friday 17 January 2020 22:27

To anyone questioning how anyone could miss; 1. Tricky angle 2. Kind of distracted by the sexy time 3. Lot of motion going on

sarsuela 29

Saturday 18 January 2020 12:47

I wonder where I have read that before...

KingAdrock 16

Saturday 18 January 2020 21:39

How can you possibly slap your own balls by mistake but miss your dong? This makes no sense. I'll take "Sh*t that never happened' for $500 Alex"...

Marcelb 17

Thursday 26 March 2020 1:38

Because his dong was inside her? I've actually had this happen while I didn't even miss her ass. She was on top and I slapped her ass, but my fingertips just touched my balls too. Difference is we both laughed and continued.