By Anonymous - 20/04/2013 01:16 - New Zealand

Today, I was the victim of a drive-by egging by some bastard riding a segway. He still got away. FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 948
You deserved it 9 259

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Never trust a guy on a segway.

sEGGway motherfucker

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Never trust a guy on a segway.

TorturedXeno 27

The worst part is you can't take out your iPhone and shoot their license plate #...

Out of shape Americans.

I remember when I first saw a segway on campus. They're the future transportation!

What do out of shape Americans have to do with New Zealand?

#13, except that OP is in New Zealand. But still, time to start that exercise routine.

#13 had all her sanity drained so they had to start siphoning off her intelligence.

16- they were invented in 2001, so, not really the future. And 21- idk if an exercise routine could even help, those things can go up to 12.5mph (20 kph)!

We should have street races on Segways, then

an average human on a dash can do 20 kph

#54 Assuming you have a spear, proper footwear, and everything I read on the internet is true, I'd have to believe you.

Considering Usain Bolt can go 36 kph, the average person should at least be able to run half as fast

They see me rollin' , they hatin'

Never trust anyone one a Segway.

Yes, 69, thank you for clarifying the first comment. NOW I understand.

Don't ever trust them

You shouldn't have mentioned THEM. Beware, #2.

THEY are always watching, so watch your comments.

Did you say THEM?!? *runs away screaming*

Damn the inimitable collective of "THEM."

Why didn't you catch him?!

Because he wasn't on a Segway. Duh.

I would laugh if a video of a guy egging people on a Segway got featured on ifunny. Coincidence? I think not..

The fact that they got away on a segway, made this a YDI.

What you don't know is that this Segway was equipped with a mustang v8 engine. The car is now just a storage box for other throwing items, like tomatoes and used condoms.

Segway has a top speed of 15+ MPH. Tell me you would have caught him on foot.

Yes, I could most certainly have speared the fuck out of him. We're not talking about an extended run here. This would be a full-on sprint, 20 seconds tops, considering the average human who is in shape can run between 17 and 22 miles an hour (with proper footwear). World class runners have hit about 28, though that would obviously be holding the bar a bit high. If you don't believe me, or you can't sprint for 20 seconds, my guess is that's because you're in poor shape, and I recommend starting a cardio regimen.

But you assume that he was even with the segway when he tried to catch him. catching up to someone going 12 mph is a lot harder when they're a good distance away.

You just got schooled

The average human runs 22mph? World class sprinters have reached that but definitely not the average person. And why in the world would you have a spear lying around?

55- I don't assume shit. Twenty seconds TOPS. That could be shorter depending on reaction time. Though I could understand being so flabbergasted by a segway egging to just stand there dumbfounded. 65 - Average person: 17 to 22 mph World class: 28 mph Learn to read, please. Being willfully Eeletterote isn't cool. Also, spear as in tackle.... An egging may be a dick move, but murder is not an appropriate response.

Because it all happened in middle earth.

How did you let him get away?

Who does this kind of thing on a segway?

Obviously the guy who did it...I'm just gonna guess assholes...

Happen*? I'm confused are you missing a word?

the first word is who not how. so no they are not missing a word.

36- your name suits you quite well.

People conducting themselves in the manner of a boss do this.

Betty White and the cast of Off Their Rockers...

Did you try following him?

You fat fcck. How can you not catch a Segway?

sEGGway motherfucker

What a rotten thing to do