Today, I was talking to a guy at the bar and I told him I was a biology major. He promptly said, "NEXT" and moved on to the girl next to me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was hanging out with a group of friends when I got into a conversation with this really attractive girl who I've liked for months. She asked me what school I go to. I sit to her left in biology. FML
Today, my biology professor was giving a lecture to everyone and used me as an example. For what? Traits men are repulsed by in potential mates. FML
Today, I saw a beautiful girl at the bar. I attempted to be friendly and hit her up for a chat. She called me a “creep” and told me to get lost. A few moments later, another guy does the exact same thing I did and she smiled and kept flirting. FML
Today, I was at a bar. A fat guy looks at me for a while and sits down next to me. He turns and I expect that he'll hit on me. He then buttons down his shirt, presses his man boobs together and say to his friends “Look, I’ve got bigger tits than than the girl next to me!" His friends agreed. FML
Today, I was on a first date at a bar, when a girl walks over and ask me if I'm a doctor. I said yes, thinking she overheard me talking about my PhD. The girl then showed me a lump on her breast and asked what to do about it. My date then slapped me and left. FML
Today, I overheard the guy I like talking to one of his friends about me. His friend asked if he and I were dating, to which he replied, "No way, dude. I have standards." FML
Today, I started college after a night out. I'd got tipsy at the club and started dancing with a cute guy. He asked for my number. I didn't want to give it to him, so I gave him a rejection number. Guess who's the new professor for my bio class? And yes, he recognized me. FML
Today, at lunch, I told a bunch of people how I had been in love with this guy since freshman year. I made a bunch of jokes about how I was going to marry him and our kids would be so attractive. He was at the table next to mine and looked back at me as soon as I finished. FML
Today, the guy I like shoved me out of the way so he could talk to another girl. FML
Today, I was at a club with my friends, when a group of guys approached us. It got quiet for a second, and I heard one of them say, "It's okay, I've got the fat one this time," then walk over and start talking to me. FML
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Top comments
csigabajnok 0
He did YOU a favor, believe me!
volnye 0
I would have said "I wish I were a DNA helicase so I could unzip your jeans..."
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Comments (56)
fck_it 0
whats wrong with majoring in bio?
louisianagrrrrl 0
don't worry, there are plenty of guys who actually appreciate smart girls.
whatsarahsaid_x 0
"brainless dumb **** to pump" actually lol'd at that. so true.
DrInsomniact 0
It's ok, people like us end up in the top 1% of the income range in the US. Poor people who party through college end up with ordinary cubical jobs.
Froppo 0
You're probably just ugly.
choppedNskrewed 0
ahahahahah 12...
chlorinator 0
I agree with 68, why is everyone assuming that he prefers airheads to bio majors? Maybe he thinks bio majors ARE airheads and went to go talk to an electrical engineer instead.
black_barbie10 0
:( that sucks,just cause of your major? loseerrr
bookworm29 0
Wow, you got a lucky escape there!
p89hg69 0
yep hes a plain dicko, nothing wrong with yr life