Today, I was lying naked on my boyfriend's bed for the first time ever. He glanced at me, then started playing with a Rubik's cube. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me for the first time. He stopped just as I was about to orgasm, and asked if I could finish by myself. Apparently he'd come up with a new algorithm for the Rubik's Cube on my desk and wanted to try it out. FML
Today, I crawled into bed, naked, wanting to get some, and hoping to surprise my boyfriend who's always complaining that I don't sleep naked. When he finally got into bed he rolled over, touched my bare ass, and said "Oh…" then rolled back over and went to sleep. FML
Today, I was laying in bed completely naked, uncovered and waiting for my husband to walk in. He laid down in bed and starting playing with his phone instead of. FML
Today, I was laying in bed naked and blindfolded. I told my boyfriend he could do anything he wanted to me. About 30 minutes later I get out of bed and find him in the computer room play World of Warcraft. His friends needed him. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to cuddle as we usually do. To prepare for this, the first thing I always do is dive into bed. This time, I felt something squishy under the covers, and screamed when I saw it was a Fleshlight. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in bed, when suddenly, he turned to me and started playing with my breasts as if they were turn tables and he was the DJ. FML
Today, I had sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was his first time too. While in bed, he blankly stopped and stood up and got out a piece of paper from his pocket. Turns out he'd written instructions on what to do while in bed, and forgot what he had to do next. FML
Today, I was laying on the bed, naked, waiting for my boyfriend to come home since we haven't had sex in almost a month. Hearing him come in, I struck my sexiest pose. He walked into our room and tossed his backpack at me. Not only did we not have sex, his backpack gave me a black eye. FML
Today, I slept in my boyfriend's room for the first time. I also wet the bed for the first time in a decade. FML
Today, I was with my boyfriend. He got up, shut the blinds and turned around to say, "I don't usually shut the blinds, but no one can see this." Assuming we were going to have sex, I took my pants off. He asked me what I was doing, then sat down to eat an entire tub of ice cream. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
metalhead4740 14
Well the man has his priorities straight...
GenaALazer 22
He might have gotten nervous. Don't worry, it's probably just a one time thing.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (107)
harrisoncohix 5
Naked girlfriend or rubik's cube? #INTJproblems
Zebediabolical 43
Any man who can solve a rubix cube can very likely take off your bra with a single finger, and definitely has the manual skills to get you off. He's just warming up!
FrankHotpants 31
What happened is he heard about the similarities between the woman's ****** and the Rubik's cube.
kaitlynnn95 10
Maybe he was just doing a warm-up.
alexxeon 5
Maybe he wasn't in the mood?
RedPillSucks 31
The simplest explanation is always the best.
qwertyu_ioplk 9
all i thought of was alfie deyes, because he can do a rubix in under a minute
feelingold 18
So to sum up: ravishing the present participle not ravishing the adjective. Sorry 42. My inner grammar Nazi is satisfied and order is restored once again...
vegas_jose 18
He wanted to break a mental sweat before his physical one.
BubbaJ80 11
Sounds like he likes playing with little toys
Espolax 8
Did he at least solve it?