Today, I was driving home on the highway with my wife and her parents. As I overtook another car, a rock got kicked up into our windshield. My wife screamed about the crack it created, while my mother-in-law goaded her on and mocked my "piss-poor driving." FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I was really excited that I'd made it the two weeks I'd borrowed my mother-in-law's new car without putting a scratch on it. I got off work to discover a customer's child throwing rocks in the parking lot. They cracked the windshield. FML
Today, I just got my windshield fixed due to a rock hitting it off the highway. Just one hour later on my way home, a large stick flew off the back of a landscaping truck. My windshield is cracked again. FML.
Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified, me or him. FML
Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML
Today, I purchased a new car. On the drive home, gusts of wind blew up debris and pebbles and caused little chips in the paint and small chips on the windshield. FML
Today, my mom drove my car and had to make a U-turn on a narrow street. Instead of slowing down, she sped up to turn, running off the road and denting my car. To make things worse, she blamed me for not giving her good directions, then followed that up with, "It's not that bad." FML
Today, I took my 15 year-old daughter driving. I yelled at her for not going safely around corners. On the way home, while demonstrating how to drive right, I went around a corner and hit a cement truck. FML
Today, I was driving with my parents while explaining that young people like myself are better drivers because we have better reflexes. My explanation was suddenly interrupted with the sound of me crashing the car against a parked car. FML
Today, my father took me out for some driving lessons. Out of nowhere, a huge, apparently suicidal bird dove into the windshield, putting a crack in it. My father yelled at me as if it was my fault, and is demanding I pay for the repairs. FML
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Top comments
Minna_fml 14
Check OPs name.
hopsinlove17 26
I read it as MILF O.O
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Comments (78)
ohrlly7457 7
Mother in law is just an anogram for woman hitler.
DocBastard 40
anagram* It's also an anagram for Lemon Wraith, Whiten Molar, and A Thrown Lime. What's your point?
melikeyturtles 3
Trolled by the Doc!
Shrike 24
69- If you think that was trolling, then this must be your first day on the internet, friend.
bioboy725 10
That sucks. We just ended up with a crack in ours too.
greenie213 23
How the hell is the rock to the windshield your fault? Seriously!
bioboy725 10
First thing, I think that's the point. Second, that's an awesome profile pic.
perdix 31
Why are you driving into flying rocks? Are you paying attention? Maybe if you weren't texting and driving, you could successfully swerve and dodge flying pebbles. It's not hard if you focus on safe driving.
jem970 19
Because swerving all over a possibly crowded road to avoid rocks is so safe Perdix LOL PS. I know he is kissing around people!
jem970 19
*kidding* I hate auto-fill in
P1P_BOY 6
safe driving, yet most people try to go as fast as possible above the speed limit without getting a ticket
perdix 31
#20, You're right, I am always kissing around. That's why I spend so much on Chap-stik!
chelseaaababyyy 17
16 - You really shouldn't be kissing around. There is such a thing as cooties, you know.
Enslaved 38
*Circle circle dot dot* Now you've got your cootie shot.
therealafroninga 10
I'd like to see that circle dot shit work on the real cooties: herpes.
outoftown 27
#21, Luckily, your auto-fill has a sense of humor :)
desireev 18
34- You mad, bro? Has the herp got ya down? Haha! :)
hanz99 1
Time to move on and trade up.
P1P_BOY 6
what does having a rock hit your window have to do with piss poor driving.... and it must have been one big rock if your wife got that worked over about it and hopefully the repair cost to fill the hole isn't much. FYL.
Enslaved 38
You don't have to go with Safelite for repairs. Many insurance companies will allow you to replace (and not just fix your windshield) without a deductible. (: It depends on the laws where you live.
Senseless_487 29
It also depends on the size of the crack. I guess in California, if the crack is shorter than the length of a dollar bill, there's no deductible. I'm only going off of what my insurance company told me a few years ago when I had a crack fixed.
glittercookies 12
In my state, by law we get a free windshield replacement once a year. Just check for those odd little state bonuses!
Welshite 40
Flying pebbles are unavoidable on the road. Tell your wife and mother-in-law that they should start picking up all the rocks on highways to make it safer for other drivers. That should shut them up.
outoftown 27
...and that you will be glad to drop them off back where the pebble struck so they can get started right away.
berryblizzard 11
Well it's your mother-in-law so that whole saying of "you can choose your friends, but can't choose family" doesn't really apply here.
darryaz 9
After you slash her I'll vote "SHE deserved it"