Today, I was driving home on the highway with my wife and her parents. As I overtook another car, a rock got kicked up into our windshield. My wife screamed about the crack it created, while my mother-in-law goaded her on and mocked my "piss-poor driving." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was really excited that I'd made it the two weeks I'd borrowed my mother-in-law's new car without putting a scratch on it. I got off work to discover a customer's child throwing rocks in the parking lot. They cracked the windshield. FML
Today, I just got my windshield fixed due to a rock hitting it off the highway. Just one hour later on my way home, a large stick flew off the back of a landscaping truck. My windshield is cracked again. FML.
Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified, me or him. FML
Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML
Today, I purchased a new car. On the drive home, gusts of wind blew up debris and pebbles and caused little chips in the paint and small chips on the windshield. FML
Today, my mom drove my car and had to make a U-turn on a narrow street. Instead of slowing down, she sped up to turn, running off the road and denting my car. To make things worse, she blamed me for not giving her good directions, then followed that up with, "It's not that bad." FML
Today, I took my 15 year-old daughter driving. I yelled at her for not going safely around corners. On the way home, while demonstrating how to drive right, I went around a corner and hit a cement truck. FML
Today, I was driving with my parents while explaining that young people like myself are better drivers because we have better reflexes. My explanation was suddenly interrupted with the sound of me crashing the car against a parked car. FML
Today, my father took me out for some driving lessons. Out of nowhere, a huge, apparently suicidal bird dove into the windshield, putting a crack in it. My father yelled at me as if it was my fault, and is demanding I pay for the repairs. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Minna_fml 14
Check OPs name.
hopsinlove17 26
I read it as MILF O.O
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (78)
GothickNihilist 15
That wouldn't make a bad driver. If you got in a crash , and killed a bunch of people, or even totaled the car than you would be a bad driver. A rock hitting the windshield sometimes happens. Don't sweat the small stuff, parents can say stupid shit , it doesn't make them right .
Evaloscity 6
Getting into a car accident doesnt automatically make you a bad driver. There's a reason it's called an accident. I got into an accident where the other driver died. I'm an excellent driver, though. Accidents, people.. Accidents.
rott3n 6
You tell that bitch in the back to stfu!
PipingMouse 14
I think your wife is a little on the spazzy side. Hope you have a good insurance OP, or your in-law will goad you about being too "piss-poor" to afford it. :P
Tamz13 2
If she acts like that stupid of a bitch over something completely unavoidable, GET THE HELL OUT NOW!!! It's only gonna get worse from here!!
iwadasn 33
If my windshield got cracked I'd get pissed too. That's no reason to divorce someone.
Tamz13 2
Apparently you didn't bother to read OP whole post. Wifey is not just mad about the windshield which is reasonable, she is BLAMING him, which is completely ridiculous. Sorry, but that kind of behavior never changes. So unless you're the sort who enjoys being bitched and nagged at for everything you have no control over, I stand by what I said. And no, I am not bashing women, I've had a couple exes that acted the same & I learned the hard way, with that kind of person, it will always be your fault!
Iknowsomestuff 9
That sounds like a fun family.
SmittyKick 18
Tell your In-Law that shes the next one to get cracked if she dosnt shut up..
alwayswinning123 7
Your mother-in-law is just jealous of your driving skills
limitedition 25
You need to install ejection seats. One warning then... Splat!!
jezalfa_ 12
I love your name, OP. Hahahaha.
neurodoc 1
It's in times like these you wish you had a convertible when you could get both of them with one stone. :P Juz kiddin pal. Feel for you man. FYL