Today, I was cooking. I leaned over the stove to preheat the oven, and burned my nipple on a pot of boiling water. I also have a teething son who is breastfeeding. FML
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Today, I was cooking, and I took a pot of boiling water to the sink to drain. My pot holder slipped, and the boiling water spilled all over my breasts. Second degree boob burns are bad, but losing half a nipple to potato salad is worse. FML
Today, while cooking, I managed to burn my finger. I quickly turned the tap on and ran my finger under cold water, but apparently someone had just used the hot tap, because boiling water flooded out onto my nicely scalded finger. FML
Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML
Today, I spilt a very hot cup of tea all over a burn I got yesterday from spilling a very hot cup of tea. FML
Today, I had to explain to my husband that while trying to figure out how to make coffee on our stupid new machine, I was in fact nude, so when I finally got it to work and steam came hissing out of the nozzle, I got first degree burn on my nipple. FML
Today, I accepted I can't cook at all. Why? I burned myself cooking popcorn in a microwave oven. I accidentally burst the package open and a scorching kernel flew into my bra. FML
Today, I burned myself while cooking, so I asked my mom to get the burn cream while I waited in the kitchen. While I was waiting, I absentmindedly set my hand on the hot stove, earning myself a second burn. FML
Today, while grabbing a husk of corn out of the boiling hot pot, I splashed hot water on my neck, dropped the corn on my injured toe, and cut myself on the counters, all while my family laughed at my pain. FML
Today, I burned my butt on the heater when I tried to warm up after my shower. FML
Today, I made a cup of tea at work. Whilst talking to a workmate, I took a sip of the tea, which I had forgotten was boiling hot, and laughed at the same time, causing it to come out of my nose. I have blistered my whole mouth and even burnt my nostrils. FML
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Top comments
PistachioNut94 0
were you naked?
blacklikemyheart 0
Its a shame people don't have two nipples...
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Comments (284)
SickToDeath 0
ouch :S u hav 2 tho dont u? use the other 1 ;)
dspadres 0
Doesn't it take more time to write like a complete douche bag than to use real words?
alleyes 0
just look at the name "SickToDeath" probably has to type with one finger in between blackouts and convulsions. If not, then yes a douce bag
22jrdn55 15
wtf? why do you guys care? and hows this you're business? we're on the internet, NOT ENGLISH CLASS so basically everyone is free to write the way they like So StOp BeInG sUcH dOuChBaGeS aNd LeAvE tHe GiRl AlOnE!!!
blackhawk465 0
You're right. Looking intelligent is overrated. Looking retarded is where it's at.
tanjoodo 3
"Your" not you're
noahvs67 0
grammar Nazis! quick hide the Internet Jews
bluegoldfish 7
no 232, your is the possesive pronoun, you,re is a contraction of the pronoun "you" and the verb "are". so 205 is right.
happi_pineapple 0
Why would you cook naked? Go ahead and be naked in the rest of your house, but kitchens are dangerous. Wear protection next time.
Witchcraft_fml 5
On top of that, the image of the OP scratching at her crabs-infested pubes and then handling people's food is nauseating. :]
lol_urlife_sucks 0
Why the hell would you assume she has crabs? That's just grotesque. Grow up, and stop assuming everyone in the world has problems like you. ;)
alleyes 0
why did you have to lean over so much? average sized body with midget arms?
danielleFML 0
awesome image, thanks for the lolz
Moosezilla 0
Use the other nipple?
mollyjynxjax 28
She still has to get the milk out of the other or she'll get an infection
bean_dawg 0
pics or it didn't happen
RuralNinja 0
YDI for cooking naked and leaning across a pot of boiling water.
the1krutz 0
And now you know better than to boil water topless. Painful lesson, but you'll remember it next time.
perdix 31
You're supposed to boil the RUBBER ones! Ask your husband to lend you one of his, he's not using them.
Lonely_Lez 0
HAH! That is the most perfect reply!
seanreddog 4
FIRST! omg.
chocoLIFE_fml 2
(-_-)
Ligerie 0
no one is arguing that I thought they were shocked, its just that you had to be rude about it.
MrMcKeigue 0
You expect sympathy for hanging your naked boobie over scalding water?