Today, I was back home from work drinking coffee when I heard someone open the door with a key. It was my boyfriend, who obviously didn't expect to see me home. We don't live together, and I never gave him a key. FML
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Drunk dick
Today, my now ex-boyfriend called the cops on me and told them I wasn’t letting him in the house. His keys were in the door, he was just too drunk to unlock it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were wondering whose extra spare key was on the counter when we came home. Turns out it's his ex's and she returned it, while neither of us were home. We're still taking inventory to see what's missing. FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend came to visit. We went to a cafe where I managed to lock myself in the toilet, breaking the key. I then had to wait for them to break down the door. I came out to applause from everyone, who had been laughing at me for 25 minutes. FML
Not a morning person
Today, I was woken up by the sound of someone in my room. I started freaking out, thinking someone had broken in, so I kicked them, only to realise it was my boyfriend coming back from the toilet. I'd forgotten he was staying over. FML
Today, I had just gotten home after being away for 8 months. My key didn’t work on my lock and while I was messing the door a man with a child opened. My landlord gave someone my apartment while I was away. FML
Today, I was home alone. I didn't expect anyone to be anywhere near home, so when I got out of the shower, I walked to the living room, naked, to get the tv remote for my room. Only to find the UPS guy standing at our glass front door. I screamed... so did he. FML
Hey how are you?
Today, I came home early to surprise my wife. No, it's not what you're thinking: I didn't find her cheating on me. She wasn't even home, but my dad was. He'd used his spare key and was on my sofa, drinking my beer, and watching my TV. The first words out of his mouth? "Your beer's shit." FML
Today, I couldn't find my key so I sat against the wall to wait for my roommate to get home. I fell asleep. When I woke up a few hours later, I could hear her inside. She chose not to wake me up and let me in. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house and we were just about to kiss. Until his mum walked in saying his girlfriend was at the door. I thought I was already there. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me over for dinner. When I walked in the door, he asked why I was here; apparently he dialed the wrong girlfriend. FML
Top comments
Welshite 39
Confiscate his key and keep an eye on yours. That's creepy.
ipman737 18
Have a serious talk with him?
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Comments (121)
fuggotmuggot 14
I dont think she'll even report him. Thats her boyfriend.
mike7236 5
Probably *was* her boyfriend. That's some creepy shit, sounds like you're pretty early on in the relationship too so good thing you caught him now and not later down the track.
atalanta18 10
stalker much?
RedPillSucks 31
Not sure if he's a stalker since he wasn't expecting her to be home. Definitely a boundary breaker thought. He may have been setting up cameras and stuff.
ahh_rats 15
#trustissues
grgnyce 8
Sorry OP, you know you need to end things ASAP!!!
Nish007 15
thats creepy
rieebee 23
my ex did that.. used to open my mail then re-seal it. he got a copy from the landlord by requesting one in my name, creepy as hell. also used to try activating gps tracking on my phone.
allplayedout 20
Unless in the extremely unlikely event you've already given a key to someone else outside the house, like a relative, and he borrowed it to plan a surprise party--which sounds like a sitcom plotline--there is no acceptable reason for how he could've gotten this key. If he has stolen one key without your knowledge, he probably has copies. Change your locks immediately and figure out how you want to deal with this guy. Please don't make the mistake of minimizing this obsessive and frightening behavior. That voice in your head telling you this is creepy and scary, the one that he's gonna argue away with any number of "reasonable" sounding explanations? Listen to that voice before this escalates.
limitedition 25
I'm with you, 56. This is a massive red flag. There is something very wrong with this guy.
skittyskatbrat 19
He most likely "borrowed" her car keys and ran out to get a copy made. "Hey, can I borrow your car to run to the store? Mine is (pick reason here) today." And then copied every dang key on it that he could. Definitely time to dump him, at the least...and definitely time to make HIM pay for any locks that get replaced.
ao34501 5
You gave him the key to your heart and he turned it into the key to your house.
StarWarsChick 9
Maybe he was planning a surprise for you when you came home... And had a copy made of your key so he could do so??? Maybe?? Who am I kidding..
iamsolid 11
It's Ezra