Today, I was at a gay bar and asking a really convincing drag queen about her daily routine. I asked how she tucked her penis in. She responded, "Um, I'm a woman." I said, "Oh I'm sorry, are you pre-op or post-op?" She said, "No, I always have been and always will be a woman, asshole." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, while I was out to eat, I was approached by the restaurant manager. He told me that while he respected my personal choices, his patrons didn't feel comfortable with someone who used to be a man using the women's restroom. He thought I was a transsexual. I am a naturally-born female. FML
Today, I asked a girl out. She replied, "Sorry, I'm suddenly a lesbian." FML
Today, I steeled my nerve, gritted my teeth, pulled my finger out, and asked our new coworker on a date. He looked at me weird, then said those four words, “But I’m not gay.” Five weeks we’ve worked together and all that time he thought I was a man. I’m a woman, born a woman, with a vagina. FML
Today, my doctor told me to take off my pants so she could do a checkup. When I took them off, she gasped. When I asked what was wrong, she said she was expecting something else. She thought I was a dude. FML
Today, I was complimented by a stranger, who said I looked great in my outfit. I thanked her, and she immediately gave me a fist-bump. I stared curiously, and she explained: she was arguing with her friends about whether I'm a man or a woman. The pitch of my voice was the answer. FML
Today, I had a job interview. When I got there, the lady interviewing me shook my hand and said, 'Hello, I'm gay.' I found this strange and I didn't know what to say, so I stated, 'Aw, it's OK, I support you.' She looked pretty offended, and I realized why when I found out that her name was Gaye. FML
Today, while shopping, a few giggling girls came up to me and asked why I was wearing a dress in public. Highly confused, I didn't answer. When they walked away laughing, I realized they thought I was a man. I'm a woman. FML
Today, a little girl came up to me and asked, "Are you a boy or a girl?" I said, "I'm a girl of course!" She walked away, looking dazed and saying, "Whoa." FML
Today, I was working at my job as a cashier, checking out an elderly woman's groceries. She was very nice, and we chatted for a couple minutes. Once she had paid, she leaned close to me and said, very politely, "I'm so so sorry that I mistook you for a girl at first, young man." I AM a girl. FML
Today, I was talking to a friend and bemoaning the fact that my new coworkers keep mixing up my gender. She looked at me critically and said, "Yeah, until you can grow a decent beard, people are going to keep thinking you're an intern or a butch lesbian." FML
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Top comments
jojo1031 0
Aren't those extremely personal questions to be asking? Could we get a transgender/transvestite to weigh in on this discussion?
Ncc_Tardis 0
I clicked YDI, then FML. It's a bit of both, I'vegottaa say, some of them can be pretty damn convincing!
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Comments (165)
mlleangelique 3
Because, #15, god forbid someone should actually give a **** about trans people if they're not trans themselves. And... WTF with all the people saying a woman shouldn't be in a gay bar/should expect abuse if she is? I knew before clicking on the comments that there was bound to be sexism, homophobia and transphobia flying around in here, but just... ugh. (Yay #17, at least, for actually knowing what they're talking about.)
Tehalon 0
Saying that women shouldnt goto gaybars (women can't be gay?? lesbian is also gay!) is like saying gay people shouldnt goto non-gaybars. Bunch of closeminded losers.
inkedgeek 0
stick it in her fartbox
ammali 0
#23, how is this abuse? OP was trying to chat this person up, and yes if you go to a gay bar you will probably be mistaken for someone of the opposite gender at some point. It's not abuse--you just correct the person and move on. Being intolerant of other people's mistakes is just as closed-minded, you know.
Elisabetha Aarron 18
Wow... Someone clearly doesn't know a thing they are talking about.
judgeymcjudge 0
*sighs* Poor OP. Whilst you blew it big time and totally cut that poor woman, I feel bad for you. You weren't trying to be an ass, you were trying to be open-minded, and that is something the whole world needs a little bit more of, even at the expense of offending a person or two. That being said, it wasn't very bright to fire off those questions right off the bat going on your own assumption - #10 is right, they are very personal, and while you were trying to be open-minded, it's always best to gauge the attitude of the subject first. Trans folk tend to fall into one extreme or the other. They're either all too willing to answer whatever questions they can, or they're offended by it and share #11's views. It's hard knowing which is which, but it takes only one slip up in conversation to find out :P Moral of the story: NEVER assume. Anything. Ever. E-V-E-R.
AntiChrist7 0
that's what happens when you are gay/ go to gay bars
SAWSS231 0
weelll this was close between a YDI and an FML because, well, the lady WAS at a gay bar...and drag queens are obviously a popular occurrence. others would have probably made the same mistake, but the questions you asked are, uh, interesting? maybe cool it on the personal ones?
mlleangelique 3
They never mentioned trying to chat someone up, thought that's beside the point. The idea that by going to a gay bar one should expect to be mistaken as someone of the opposite gender is... well, apart from anything else, it's just puzzling. It's a bizarre and stupid assumption to make. ... Which leads to, why was it abusive? 1) The assumption that someone is the opposite gender to that that they're presenting as is, if not exactly abusive, certainly potentially highly offensive. 2) The OP just asked a stranger, unprompted, about her genitalia; if you can't see why a woman might experience this as abusive, then, well, wow. Intolerance of an innocent mistake is... I think closed-minded is a bit of a stupid characterisation (particularly trying to put it on a par with bigotry), but unnecessarily unforgiving, yes. However, the OP's actions would have been disgusting even if they'd happened to have been right -- indeed, even if it were obvious that they were.
prettyxdemented 0
I clicked FML and YDI... truthfully, at a gay bar, there are a lot of people walking around who don't necessarily look their gender. Women who try to dress like men, drag queens, men trying to dress like women... it can be very confusing. The fact that you made a mistake in ascertaining her gender wasn't really your fault. BUT. Why were you asking such personal questions? A little more detail would help... if you were already talking to this girl, striking up a conversation which sort of drifted to that... maybe I could understand. But it sounds like this was someone you didn't know very well and hadn't been talking to for very long, and despite your curiosity, it's best to just wait a bit and see how cool the person in question would be with answering YOUR questions. Woman or drag queen, that was just impolite.
mlleangelique 3
Sorry, that to #26, obviously.