Today, I was at a gay bar and asking a really convincing drag queen about her daily routine. I asked how she tucked her penis in. She responded, "Um, I'm a woman." I said, "Oh I'm sorry, are you pre-op or post-op?" She said, "No, I always have been and always will be a woman, asshole." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while I was out to eat, I was approached by the restaurant manager. He told me that while he respected my personal choices, his patrons didn't feel comfortable with someone who used to be a man using the women's restroom. He thought I was a transsexual. I am a naturally-born female. FML
Today, I asked a girl out. She replied, "Sorry, I'm suddenly a lesbian." FML
Today, I steeled my nerve, gritted my teeth, pulled my finger out, and asked our new coworker on a date. He looked at me weird, then said those four words, “But I’m not gay.” Five weeks we’ve worked together and all that time he thought I was a man. I’m a woman, born a woman, with a vagina. FML
Today, my doctor told me to take off my pants so she could do a checkup. When I took them off, she gasped. When I asked what was wrong, she said she was expecting something else. She thought I was a dude. FML
Today, I was complimented by a stranger, who said I looked great in my outfit. I thanked her, and she immediately gave me a fist-bump. I stared curiously, and she explained: she was arguing with her friends about whether I'm a man or a woman. The pitch of my voice was the answer. FML
Today, I had a job interview. When I got there, the lady interviewing me shook my hand and said, 'Hello, I'm gay.' I found this strange and I didn't know what to say, so I stated, 'Aw, it's OK, I support you.' She looked pretty offended, and I realized why when I found out that her name was Gaye. FML
Today, while shopping, a few giggling girls came up to me and asked why I was wearing a dress in public. Highly confused, I didn't answer. When they walked away laughing, I realized they thought I was a man. I'm a woman. FML
Today, a little girl came up to me and asked, "Are you a boy or a girl?" I said, "I'm a girl of course!" She walked away, looking dazed and saying, "Whoa." FML
Today, I was working at my job as a cashier, checking out an elderly woman's groceries. She was very nice, and we chatted for a couple minutes. Once she had paid, she leaned close to me and said, very politely, "I'm so so sorry that I mistook you for a girl at first, young man." I AM a girl. FML
Today, I was talking to a friend and bemoaning the fact that my new coworkers keep mixing up my gender. She looked at me critically and said, "Yeah, until you can grow a decent beard, people are going to keep thinking you're an intern or a butch lesbian." FML
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Top comments
jojo1031 0
Aren't those extremely personal questions to be asking? Could we get a transgender/transvestite to weigh in on this discussion?
Ncc_Tardis 0
I clicked YDI, then FML. It's a bit of both, I'vegottaa say, some of them can be pretty damn convincing!
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Comments (165)
noobeater5 0
what the **** is a woman doing @ a gay bar anyways?
Roto13 0
Goddamn fag hags.
eastmanwolf 0
Was she an actually ~drag queen~ who performs or did you just assume she was a "drag queen" because she was a woman in a gay bar and you thought she looked like a man dressed as a woman? If the former, you didn't deserve it. If the latter, you did deserve it.
Bunbu 8
@88 Drag queens are ALWAYS male, dumbass. Women perform as drag kings. OP, you're an asshole.
Chris968 0
Another comment to everyone asking why a woman was in the gay bar... just because she is a woman doesn't mean she's straight. I'm gay and my lesbian friends come to gay bars too because they're not always JUST for gay men. Just like I go to lesbian bars with them sometimes. So that's not really a reason to defend the OP's actions. It was inappropriate to ask those questions, period.
hahaatyou 0
It should really be: I met this guy at a bar who thought I was a drag queen and he asked me how I tucked my penis in. I said I was a woman. He proceeded to say "Oh I'm sorry, are you pre-op or post-op?". FML.
jpchi06 0
Yeah, im actually not a christian, i was just pointing out the flaws in someone calling someone else a queer and then talking about what god thinks in the same sentence. Maybe Fred Phelps is posting on FML.
kellster 2
For all of you saying that women don't belong in gay bars, have you ever actually been around gay men? Do you know who else is almost always there?? WOMEN. Gay men love their female friends, just not in a sexual way. There are always women at gay bars unless it's a no-ladies strip bar or something. The OP is just an asshole for making stupid assumptions.
Lifey66 0
HAHHA oh wow. its like you shoved your foot in your mouth, then proceeded to shove the other one up your own ass too.
acow 0
It's actually possible that she *was* a drag queen, and refused to leave character. Some of them are really hardcore about it.