Miscellaneous: Today, I was arrested for breaking into a house. This is what...

By Matthew - 27/11/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, I was arrested for breaking into a house. This is what happens when I lose my key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 883

You deserved it 4 580

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Same thing different taste

By phansmootchie - 20/12/2011 08:14 - United States

Today, I lost my keys. My roommate locked me out, then yelled at me when I made her come home to let me in. I tore my room apart searching for them, and even went out to search my locker room. When I got home, I glanced at my wall only to find my keys hanging on the hook I set up specifically for them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 302

You deserved it 37 438

By MadameM - 26/02/2009 08:17 - United States

Today, I accidentally locked my car and house keys along with my phone in my car. Then I had to break into my own house looking for the spare. Someone called the police and I had to explain that I lived there. I forgot to grab the spare when I went to talk to the police officers I locked the door behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 132

You deserved it 9 751

By FailedEngineer - 20/10/2009 21:31 - Australia

Today, I lost my house keys while staggering home drunk, so I decided to climb through an opened window and promptly went to bed. Twenty minutes later the police wake me up while attempting to search my place. The neighbors thought I was a burglar and called the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 266

You deserved it 35 648

By yuuupyup - 18/04/2012 00:55 - United States - Somerset

Today, while driving home, I realized I forgot my house key. Luckily, when I arrived home, someone had already broken into my house. Guess I didn't need the key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 425

You deserved it 2 038

By Anonymous - 21/07/2009 17:16 - United States

Today, I left a note on the kitchen table saying to leave the door unlocked because I lost my key. I come home to find our house ransacked and robbed. Minutes later, I found my key. In my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 401

You deserved it 60 565

By Anonymous - 22/01/2016 19:00 - United States - Royersford

Today, I got locked out of my house. After trying unsuccessfully to jimmy the lock, I managed to climb in through the kitchen window. I soon found out I had an effect on the door after all; it won't open at all any more, even with the right key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 303

You deserved it 5 738

By Anonymous - 19/09/2014 08:58 - Belgium

Today, in a rush to get out of my house to go to a doctor's appointment, I closed the door behind me without having my house or car keys on me. Sadly, it took me less than a minute to break into my own house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 077

You deserved it 6 033

By artmfanforever - 22/09/2010 20:39 - United States

Today, I locked myself out of my car. While walking home to retrieve the spare, I realized I locked my house keys inside the house this morning. Now I must decide whether to break into my house or car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 336

You deserved it 25 767

By ABBenzin - 01/02/2012 16:11 - United States

Today, I was breaking into a house when three police cruisers pulled up. They ran my social, my license plates, and asked me twenty minutes worth of questions, before allowing me to go back to work. I work as a locksmith; the homeowner had lost their keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 432

You deserved it 3 778

By Jason - 12/08/2010 20:33 - United States

Today, I spent forty minutes trying to break into my own house after being locked out. After finally getting in through a small unlocked window, I discovered my keys in my pants pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 731

You deserved it 44 380

StoryOfTheYear 14

Sunday 27 November 2011 9:20

I thought I was the only one who used that excuse...

i_amthe_walrus 0

Sunday 27 November 2011 10:01

Sorry to interrupt your very interesting conversation about how to spell a word in which I am unaware of the definition but has anyone seen my chap stick? It's blue.. Anyone?

Comments

ohwellwhyme 2

Sunday 27 November 2011 9:34

Today, I was really excited to see that an FML had 0 votes and no comments, so I finally made an account. By the time I made one, a million people had already commented. FML

unhappybitch 8

Sunday 27 November 2011 9:35

Ohh I feel bad for you, you want a cookie?

CryMoreFMLs 14

Sunday 27 November 2011 9:36

Post the FML to be moderated. Don't comment it...

dirtyfivethirty 0

Sunday 27 November 2011 9:38

I have to break in to my apartment all the time! And it's right on the street, I hope that doesn't happen to me!

daboss85 4

Sunday 27 November 2011 9:44

Wow dude dumb haha

cheeseboy77 0

Sunday 27 November 2011 10:05

this is why I have a key maker make me thousands of copies. one for every pocket,compartment and doormat I own. this way I never get locked out. don't blame me if you have unexpected visitors inside. carrying firearms...

mesbah021 1

Sunday 27 November 2011 10:13

Ydi. For. Being human.

bananagrams 9

Sunday 27 November 2011 17:14

Shut. Up.

mesbah021 1

Sunday 27 November 2011 10:13

Ydi. For. Being human.

SirCuDi 9

Sunday 27 November 2011 10:30

When I lose my key my girlfriend bitches at me

Ray_of_midnight 22

Sunday 27 November 2011 10:34

No kidding...this happened in Cambridge, Mass., to an African-American professor at Harvard University who was breaking into his own house, and was subsequently arrested by the Cambridge P.D.