Health: Today, I was admitted to the hospital for chronic constipation....

By shatMyself - 22/04/2013 19:10 - United States

Today, I was admitted to the hospital for chronic constipation. I have to share a room with two other girls who are also having bowel problems. We're all on strong laxatives, and there's apparently only one bathroom in this place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 490

You deserved it 3 427

Summer vacations: Sun and blunders
From beaches to campsites, embark on a journey filled with laughter under the sun... and a few sunburns! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/04/2013 23:13 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was given a powerful laxative to clear me out. I can't go to the bathroom because the four guests of my sleeping roommate are all sitting in dead silence against the paper-thin bathroom wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 534

You deserved it 4 033

By Anonymous - 08/12/2010 02:38 - United States

Today, I was extremely constipated. This is a side effect of the medication I take to alleviate my stomach condition. Due to this same condition I can't eat much roughage. We have no laxatives or stool softeners, and I have been shitting bricks for three days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 585

You deserved it 3 519

By Anonymous - 17/11/2009 20:05 - United States

Today, I was at home with slight constipation, so I took two laxatives. That's when my boyfriend called me, saying his parents are in town and want to have dinner tonight, this being the first time I've met them. I've already been on the toilet five times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 568

You deserved it 5 940

By shroooms - 28/07/2011 20:37 - Slovenia

Today, my entire family, myself included, has been turned into a collective diarrhea fountain after going out to eat. We only have one bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 736

You deserved it 3 078

States of matter

By Nirah - 26/07/2019 21:00 - Canada - Parksville

Today, I'm a week into a prescription of extremely constipating antibiotics. I also just caught the stomach bug going around at work that causes aggressive diarrhea. The two combined mean I have a constant, slow-moving stream of thick, foul-smelling sludge coming out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 056

You deserved it 170

By blehh - 14/04/2009 20:40 - United States

Today, I had horrible pains in my stomach area so I went to the doctors. They couldn't find anything wrong and sent me to the Emergency Room for X-rays. After spending the entire day in the hospital, they tell me I'm slightly constipated. I had to pay $400 to find out I had to take a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 303

You deserved it 54 679

By screaming monkey - 04/04/2012 10:13 - United Kingdom - Whitton

Today, I'm recovering from colon surgery. They gave me codeine as pain relief, which has made me constipated. I'm currently sat on the toilet, trying to push out what feels like a small child wrapped in barbed wire out without busting my stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 306

You deserved it 2 122

Phantom pooper

By Anonymous - 12/11/2020 17:02 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, all of my roommates were home. I really had to poop all day but the bathroom was being hogged. Once I finally got the chance to go, I guess the toilet didn't flush all the way and I didn't notice. The other roommates loudly asked each other who it was, and they all started loudly taking about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 719

You deserved it 433

By firegirl - 05/07/2018 15:00

Today, I finally got over a long bout of constipation. I was scared to ask my mom for laxatives because I had the feeling she would tell all her friends, but on the 6th day of absolutely no bowel movements, I caved. I later overheard my mom telling all her friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 925

You deserved it 379

Symphony

By Anonymous - 06/05/2009 19:17 - United States

Today, I had some pretty bad stomach pain, so I went to the bathroom. After a few minutes, two girls walked in, taking stalls next to me. That's when my farts began to get very large and explosive. Not only did they break into laughter, they waited for me to come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 500

You deserved it 5 207

asimplesharpie 7

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:40

Incoming shitstorm.

SammyS2012 21

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:41

It's the Hunger Games: Hospital Edition.

Comments

asimplesharpie 7

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:40

Incoming shitstorm.

Haduken 16

Tuesday 23 April 2013 2:00

one gets the toilet, one gets the tub, and one gets the sink

wlddog 14

Tuesday 23 April 2013 2:55

38 Way to resolve the shit out of that problem.

DracoSpirita 21

Tuesday 23 April 2013 3:37

38 - Bridesmaids reference. Awesome.

jackiemora 18

Tuesday 23 April 2013 4:10

Well they are in a ******** situation.

therealafroninga 10

Tuesday 23 April 2013 4:15

59-Are you ******** me. Your comment stunk.

wvcheesehead1 9

Tuesday 23 April 2013 5:08

Sounds like that hospital has their ***** together.,

Gmoney12 18

Tuesday 23 April 2013 6:30

I smell a game of battleshits coming on!

MrConcise 34

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:40

Shitty situation, three girls one bathroom, laxative puns, did I cover them all?

Lizardgirl 7

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:55

I smell a new shitcom.. xD (And let the downvotes commence)

Lizardgirl 7

Tuesday 23 April 2013 2:03

Well that was unexpected... xD

Catkam623 27

Tuesday 23 April 2013 2:21

How do we know its a girl? By the name I assumed it was a guy and he had to wait outside while they shat everywhere

magentaballoon15 8

Tuesday 11 March 2014 7:15

"two OTHER girls"

SammyS2012 21

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:41

It's the Hunger Games: Hospital Edition.

yeti37 16

Tuesday 23 April 2013 1:01

There is no chance I'd volunteer to be a tribute in those games.

dreamtosing 15

Tuesday 23 April 2013 2:05

And it smells pretty shitty.

Lizardgirl 7

Tuesday 23 April 2013 2:08

"And may your bowels be ever in your favor."

SammyS2012 21

Tuesday 23 April 2013 5:18

Maybe sponsors can donate buckets

Jiplo 18

Tuesday 23 April 2013 22:42

And the tributes could sabotage each other by putting more laxatives in their food.

teekie 10

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:42

They should have given you buckets...or just not put all of you in the same room to begin with!

HowieDoIt 21

Tuesday 23 April 2013 1:13

What is this, Carnival Cruise?

thepersonyouknow 9

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:43

Stupid idea on their part

ShyAnn29 14

Tuesday 23 April 2013 5:20

Yeah, I've never heard of 3 people sharing a hospital room, usually they have 2 people.

monnanon 13

Tuesday 23 April 2013 18:32

its maybe a ward. in the uk wards usually sleep 4-8.

dectivebobby 6

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:45

Alright, one takes the bathroom, the other gets a bucket and the third one...be creative OP

KeannaLove 32

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:48

Could go bridesmaids style and use the the sink.

eyesmile27 7

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:46

What a shitty situation.

Sandsh8rk 36

Tuesday 23 April 2013 1:23

What a shitty comment.

Lizardgirl 7

Tuesday 23 April 2013 2:05

What a shitty reply to a shitty comment.

MrClean17 15

Tuesday 23 April 2013 3:34

What a shit- Never mind.

Sandsh8rk 36

Tuesday 23 April 2013 4:01

What a shitty reply to a shitty reply to a shitty comment.

Lizardgirl 7

Tuesday 23 April 2013 15:12

No.

cyanidesandwich 21

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:47

Homemade 2 girls 1 cup?

dectivebobby 6

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:53

Can't really be 2 girls 1 cup if there's 3 of them...

TheBrochure 22

Tuesday 23 April 2013 1:50

15 - Nor can it Really be homemade if they're in a hospital.

license2chill 5

Tuesday 23 April 2013 3:40

15, one of them is gonna have the toilet, and the other two have to try to be resourceful..

browneyedgirl52 13

Tuesday 23 April 2013 0:48

What kind of hospital has only one bathroom?

xInwex 12

Tuesday 23 April 2013 3:17

Hopefully the OP meant one bathroom in the room she was staying in? Last time I checked hospitals had more than one bathroom. I know where I live all the hospitals have public bathrooms like every 20 feet