Today, I was admitted to the hospital for chronic constipation. I have to share a room with two other girls who are also having bowel problems. We're all on strong laxatives, and there's apparently only one bathroom in this place. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was given a powerful laxative to clear me out. I can't go to the bathroom because the four guests of my sleeping roommate are all sitting in dead silence against the paper-thin bathroom wall. FML
Today, I was constipated and so desperate to go that I ate an entire box of laxatives. Now I'm in the hospital on a saline drip for dehydration and malnutrition, in addition to getting a massive enema and having the most agonizing shit of my life. FML
Today, I was extremely constipated. This is a side effect of the medication I take to alleviate my stomach condition. Due to this same condition I can't eat much roughage. We have no laxatives or stool softeners, and I have been shitting bricks for three days. FML
Today, I was at home with slight constipation, so I took two laxatives. That's when my boyfriend called me, saying his parents are in town and want to have dinner tonight, this being the first time I've met them. I've already been on the toilet five times. FML
Today, my entire family, myself included, has been turned into a collective diarrhea fountain after going out to eat. We only have one bathroom. FML
Today, I'm a week into a prescription of extremely constipating antibiotics. I also just caught the stomach bug going around at work that causes aggressive diarrhea. The two combined mean I have a constant, slow-moving stream of thick, foul-smelling sludge coming out of me. FML
Today, I had horrible pains in my stomach area so I went to the doctors. They couldn't find anything wrong and sent me to the Emergency Room for X-rays. After spending the entire day in the hospital, they tell me I'm slightly constipated. I had to pay $400 to find out I had to take a shit. FML
Today, I'm recovering from colon surgery. They gave me codeine as pain relief, which has made me constipated. I'm currently sat on the toilet, trying to push out what feels like a small child wrapped in barbed wire out without busting my stitches. FML
Today, all of my roommates were home. I really had to poop all day but the bathroom was being hogged. Once I finally got the chance to go, I guess the toilet didn't flush all the way and I didn't notice. The other roommates loudly asked each other who it was, and they all started loudly taking about me. FML
Today, I finally got over a long bout of constipation. I was scared to ask my mom for laxatives because I had the feeling she would tell all her friends, but on the 6th day of absolutely no bowel movements, I caved. I later overheard my mom telling all her friends. FML
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Top comments
asimplesharpie 7
Incoming shitstorm.
SammyS2012 21
It's the Hunger Games: Hospital Edition.
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Comments (100)
Meme1988 18
You poor thing :(
leelogreen 5
may the odds be ever in your favour (:
WhoDey22 2
What hospital has more than 2 patients in the same room? Oh, they don't.
monnanon 14
er every hospital ive ever been to. granted im from a different country but your trying to tell me the US doesnt have wards? they are seperate bays for 4-8 people but there is rooms for up to 4 people depending on the type of problemw the ward deals with.
iamthunder 4
Time for 3 girls and a cup of soup
OldstrInMich 7
Feel your pain. In Budapest I got food poisoning. Had a choice private room or share a bathroom w/20 patients. Took private room. Had to ask for toilet paper!
Jaccob 5
Don't sneeze!
WeEighty8 1
3 girls, one toilet
The_Mr_Troll 14
Shitstorm missile inbound
hawkdoc60 3
I hope there are no fans in the room.
jixiekat 14
just poop in the sink. you will have an excuse why you did it plus you won't have to clean it up!!!!!! :)