Tune in next week for a new episode of "Sexual Harassment Seminar or Unexpected Promotion"!!

Quick! There's still time for you to spill a hot beverage on your crotch and try to explain to your VP that Siri just wrote out your exclamation of pain!

-In the criminal justice system, sexually based offenses are considered especially heinous. In New York City, the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies are members of an elite squad known as the Special Victims Unit. These are their stories...DUN DUN-

Siri is the biggest savage i know lmfao.

There's never a bad time to talk about your own dick, right?

You must talk about dicks a lot..you might want to work on that..

That could work. For the meating, wear clean underwear (or none) and bring lotion and kneepads -- depending on how the VP read it.

That'll teach for being so lazy.

Isn't that in a Chris brown song?

Siri doesn't send unless you confirm the message. This is fake news.