Today, I tried to hint to my husband that we needed a new washing machine. I mentioned that we got our current one way back on our wedding day. He replied, "Yeah, and I got you too." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I gave my husband an expensive watch. The first words out of his mouth were, "You didn't use our joint bank account for this, right?" He then asked if I still had the receipt. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I celebrated our five-year anniversary. I got him a new flat-screen TV. He got me toilet seat cover. FML
Today, while a very cute girl was explaining the apartment's laundry machines to me, I blurted out, "It's okay, my pants are used to handling huge loads". FML
Today, while talking to my parents about my car, my dad said, "Don't put a lot of money into it because we will give you ours when we move." I asked why, and my mom responded, "Well, we helped your sister with her wedding, so this is going to be your wedding gift." I'm getting a car out of pity for not having a wife. FML
Today, trying to be cute, I told my soon-to-be husband he was the ying to my yang. He responded with, "Baby, you're the Monica Lewinsky to my Bill Clinton." FML
Today, I came home to find my fiancé trying to do laundry. His version was "rubbing the smelly spots with baby powder". Looks like I'll be the only one doing laundry for the rest of our lives. FML
Today, after spending $300 replacing a dryer and getting the vents cleaned out when our tenants complained their clothes weren't getting dry, my husband and I realized that it was actually the washing machine that was broken. FML
Today, my husband finally decided to help with the laundry. He washed a pen and it exploded in the dryer. FML
Today, I got a new washer and dryer set. It's sad when all you have to do at night is make popcorn and watch the clothes washing. I even invited friends over. FML
Today, I asked my SO for help with just the laundry, which translated into him only washing his clothes. We're married with multiple kids, and I currently work 2 jobs. FML
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Top comments
iggz 0
He does have a valid point...
twofirstnames 12
If you read it the same way I did.. It sounds kinda sweet, but at the same time it sounds like he's calling you old or something. If any of that makes sense.
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Comments (188)
hannahcorrine 0
Tome for a replacement
seeb49 7
Tome? As in large book?
Llama_Face89 34
HA! OP's husband is a guy I could get along with!
perdix 31
Maybe he can take this chance to switch from a worn-out, wasteful top-loader to a sexy, new front-loader. And maybe even try a different kind of washing machine, too.
taazer 12
Just keepin it real ;)
ThorneCrossed 9
You need you wash up on your hinting skills. Hahaha get it????
BellaBelle_fml 23
No, it sounds more like OP's hinting skills are all washed up.
hbbs93 6
WIN x2
ekuechle 0
That's true what he said
polkadotsocks 11
Some guys can't take a hint, if you want something tell him. Who knows, maybe he just has a deep burning desire for that washer and doesn't want it replaced
DrewsFML 8
He means you and the washer may be getting a little creaky but he can still turn you both on and deposit a large load just as effectively as when you were first married. It's sweet, really.
NEEPLES 7
Lololol thumbs up!!!
NEEPLES 7
Lololol thumbs up!!!
NEEPLES 7
Lololol thumbs up!!!
DustyStorm 16
Hahaha!!! One of the best retorts I've read!!!! Bravo!!!!
bizarre_ftw 22
Say "good point! We'll send me to a spa for a week to rejuvenate, recuperate, and replenish myself, and we'll just replace the washing machine because it's cheaper that way and it's not like we vowed to keep it Forever, right?" then smile and go plan your vacation :)
firemedic919 0
hopefully its point taken.