Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the very first time in three years. Apparently, all it took was anal. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. He followed it with, "Want to try anal?" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML
Today, I spontaneously poured my heart out for my boyfriend, telling him how much I love and adore him. He answered by leaning in close, saying, "Jolly good" in an affected accent, and burping loud and clear in my ear. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied by telling me to fuck off. FML
Today, while at dinner, I told my boyfriend that I wished he liked sushi. He replied, "I wish you liked anal." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML
Today, I looked my boyfriend in the eyes and said, "I love y-" He cut me off with, "Babe, a blowjob's worth a thousand words" and held eye contact until I awkwardly excused myself. FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted to tell me how much he loves me. He said a lot of wonderful things, such as not being able to live without me and hoping that I would want to live with him and marry him someday. He ended his loving speech with his ex-girlfriend's name instead of mine. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He responded by fist pumping. FML
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Top comments
PandaSmile 24
Buy a strap on and tell him you're ready to go next time he wants sex. Or dump him.
JaffaMC 13
He sounds like a pain in the ass, FYL
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Comments (100)
Arkajion 14
what's with guys and anal? I would never give anal. sticking my sick in someone's ass is just purely disgusting.
millie14225 31
we have no context here. was this the first time OP said it? in that case run and fyl! have they been dating awhile and he was suggesting something he wanted to try? or, just because he was dead serious doesn't mean he wasn't joking. there are too many variables!
cole66 14
u guys act like the man committed a murder or something, good gravy, it was a joke for crying out loud
leogachi 15
@60 Yeah, it's so obvious it was a joke. You know, with Op saying her boyfriend was dead serious, I don't know what everyone is so hyped up about.
pharm121 21
Geez what is it about straight boys and anal. I'm gay and am less obsessed about it then they are. Ha!
TimidRobot 8
He was obviously joking... I thought it was pretty funny.
snowboard143 9
At first i read it as brother. Not boyfriend
Zaketh2112 10
anal aint got shit to say
fyvaprold 11
DTMFA
thatonetribute 31
Oh my god, leave him! A partner is supposed to love you for more than sex. What a jerk.
rafoliv 4
He's got a point.