Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the very first time in three years. Apparently, all it took was anal. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. He followed it with, "Want to try anal?" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML
Today, I spontaneously poured my heart out for my boyfriend, telling him how much I love and adore him. He answered by leaning in close, saying, "Jolly good" in an affected accent, and burping loud and clear in my ear. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied by telling me to fuck off. FML
Today, while at dinner, I told my boyfriend that I wished he liked sushi. He replied, "I wish you liked anal." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML
Today, I looked my boyfriend in the eyes and said, "I love y-" He cut me off with, "Babe, a blowjob's worth a thousand words" and held eye contact until I awkwardly excused myself. FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted to tell me how much he loves me. He said a lot of wonderful things, such as not being able to live without me and hoping that I would want to live with him and marry him someday. He ended his loving speech with his ex-girlfriend's name instead of mine. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He responded by fist pumping. FML
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Top comments
PandaSmile 24
Buy a strap on and tell him you're ready to go next time he wants sex. Or dump him.
JaffaMC 13
He sounds like a pain in the ass, FYL
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Comments (100)
Le_ponderer 14
You should have responded "Dibs on being on top" and gone to lube up a large cucumber; all while cackling sporadically.
Jryan952015 7
Well technically he's right actions are better then word although I wouldn't have used the same as him. But it's a two way street you both need to your love for each other. So you better get ready to suck some d!ck!!!
Talis99 26
How childish.
Leinster 2
This has got to be b8
HerpNdurp88 0
Agreed!
shay_serendipity 29
I don't think suggesting a breakup is entirely extreme in this case. If OP loves him and he didn't take it seriously/give a sincere reply, I wouldn't stay around long if he's just in it for sex.
Mynxie 26
I don't get why guys demand that so damn much. Not all women are into it. Damn you **** industry haha
Big_Poppa12 12
Hahahah sorry OP this made my morning
countryb_cth 38
Are you sure it only made your morning and not your hole weak?
teentee401 37
"You know what? You're right, honey. Bend over and I'll get the strap on."
grajax 24
How long have you guys been dating?
pacman490 21
If anal is louder than taking, he might be doing it wrong
stickthatwhere 16
Yes, let's everybody dump him for that one less than apealing joke. This makes sense