By dude5028 - 08/09/2009 21:17 - United States

Today, I switched from a pediatrician to an adult doctor. The guy was really persistant about a few personal questions. Then he brought my parents in the room and told them that I have an abnormally small penis and what remedies he knows of to fix it. FML
I agree, your life sucks 60 138
You deserved it 4 104

Same thing different taste

Top comments

oh wow.. that really sucks LOL :[ Doesn't that break that whole doctor-patient confidentiality agreement? :/

Just because you're no longer going to a pediatrician doesn't mean you're 18. It just means you're old enough to not sit in a room with a stack of Highlights magazines, kid toys, and tiny chairs. After a certain age, you just don't feel it's necessary to sit in a room with train wallpaper.


oh wow.. that really sucks LOL :[ Doesn't that break that whole doctor-patient confidentiality agreement? :/

Ligerie 0

not if they are under age. But thats sucks,op. sorry about your small penis =[

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Yeah, I'd say it definitely does. Since he just switched from pediatrics to adult medicine, it implies that he recently turned 18. And that means it's not the doctor's decision to tell his parent's anything. He would have had to give consent, and I'm sure if he was aware of the problem, he wouldn't have done that. Switch doctors again, dude. You have a bad one.

Just because you're no longer going to a pediatrician doesn't mean you're 18. It just means you're old enough to not sit in a room with a stack of Highlights magazines, kid toys, and tiny chairs. After a certain age, you just don't feel it's necessary to sit in a room with train wallpaper.

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Dude, if he is 18 why the hell would his parents be at the doctors with him? I think if he was 18 and going to the doctor his mommy and daddy wouldn't be there with him. I am guessing he is probably 13.

boatkicker 4

Ha. My pediatrician kicke me out when I turned 18, which sucks because none of the adult doctors in my area were taking on new patients at the time. I either had to drive over an hour, or not see a doctor. (I chose option #2)

RustyShackelfurt 0

Hypothetically speaking, what remedies did he speak of? They are for my friend of course!

mcbob_kool 0

yeah...Metallica and Slayer are EPIC...SOAD's just awesome

hey your lucky he caught it early before it went out of hand

Actually the doctor can have buttsex with you no matter how small your penis is, all you need is an asshole.

Well, that would be overkill on a small penis.

gosrisky 1

however, here at mlia we do anyways xP

LOL! That's ****** up. ______________________________

awwwww poor thing... as if his parents didn't already know though! And you never know - maybe he is a "grower" not a "shower".

djb23 0 all this made me think of

Agreed. This isn't as bad as it seems dude. At least now you know what to do about it. I (if I had a penis) would rather find out in a doctors office than with a girl my first time. Before you give me crap about how I don't understand because I'm a girl, I'll let you know that I have larger than average lips. I have a tough time wearing swimsuits because I look like I have a sack with some serious camel toe.

It's probably that if a man loses 30 lbs he'll SEE another inch of his penis. Before the loss, it would be concealed by his big ol' belly.

ovyind 0

Don't be silly, it's because of the fat stored at the base of the penis. When you burn fat it disappears too, cause there to be a larger amount of penis portruding.

Another bonus is that the ladies don't have to hold your adipose bag of corpulence over their heads like a tarp when they blow you. They hate that. They make you pay extra. Or, so I've heard.

hella_elyse 0

You just left me speechless with my jaw open haha. Oh what the anonymity of the internet brings out of people. Gotta love it! Props to including that useful tidbit of information there :)

Actually, doctor/patient confidentiality extends to everyone (disregarding small children)

Camel milk. So I've heard. But, I'm a chick, and don't really worry about that. But unless you have, like, a micropenis, you shouldn't be concerned. Read the Kama Sutra. Learn. To some chicks, a big penis hurts.

It doesn't matter how old the person is, doctor patient confidentiality is ALWAYS there whether they're 13 or 75, so yes that does violate it, report him.

hahahahahahahaha that's funny and no of course it doesn't break the confidentiality cause their his parents and he was gonna tell them ways to fix it

eat_this_buddie 5

#52 He might not have his license and his parents drove him.

It only breaks confidentiality if he was over 18 or sharing the information with someone who was not the guys parent or guardian.

xMooMoox 0

At least op is getting help now

"...My **** is much bigger than yours, My **** can walk right through the door With a feeling so pure.. It's got you screaming back for more...."

mo_the_owl 0

"My dick bigger than a bridge Your dick look like a little kids My dick rush like the chargers (the whole team) Your shit look like you fourteen My dick locked in a cage (right) Your dick suffer from stage fright My dick so hot its stolen Your dick look like Gary Coleman My dick is like supersize Your dick look like two fries My dick more mass than the Earth Your dick half staff (it needs work) "

the_coon_fml 0

i meant urs. he just added his as i was typing. haha he's a fake nyway. like the fake plexico.

Byah 2

#26's song is "My Dick" by Mickey Avalon. Anyway, sucks that he would reveal something like that without your consent (as he's supposed to do), OP.

The fake Plexico and p1exico are both gone for good. Anyway, lyrics dude, WIN!!! Mega win. You unlocked my approval!

Unregistered 0

lmao how do you not know that song? calling it fake wow do you get out often?

the_coon_fml 0
the_coon_fml 0

wait what? haha n the real p1exico. the one who was the "voice of reason" on fml.

mo_the_owl 0

haha Actually, I'm a girl. and I wasn't trying to bite off IRWL style -just some lyrical banter. ;] his simply reminded me of that one [granted, a terrible song but fitting].

the_coon_fml 0

o. k good cause i hate ppl like tht. n unregistered. haha if he see's this he's gonna reply with some bullshit.


Cigaro. FTW. Pwned. Well spoken, ireply_w_lyrics!

lmao nvm lyrics i read all the other fml's you posted on and i have just one thing to say- stop posting on fml you are getting really ennoying seriously nobody cares that you can reply with lyrics

Ouch that was mean to say Intoxic lol What did you mean by plex being gone though? _________________________

Its k, its not the real Intoxicunt. Click on the profile.

Lol man this shit is so childish. __________________________

yup. SHIT. i have two l's in my name that can be capital i's

Why did he switch from a pediatrician to an adult doctor? All pediatricians are adults! Doogie Howser was just a TV show, not a documentary. How's a minor going to buy malpractice insurance, huh? He should have stuck with the pediatrician so his doctor would consider his penis small-ish instead of "abnormally small." Better yet, he should have never left his neo-natologist who would have that thought he was HUGE!

If you're going to imitate me, learn how to ******* spell. Idiot. Actually, if you're going to imitate me, go visit the Grand Canyon and dive into it. Trust me, there's lots of deep water at the bottom.

Haha, that's the first thing that got me. Second was the fact that the real one would insult in a wittier way :P

Exactly. Plus, you know I read most of your comments. Your style and humor is no stranger to me. If I were going to impersonate someone, I would be effective. I would observe the way they type, who they talk to, everything. I guess some people just want their 15 minutes of infamy before they get banned.

my dick benchpress 350, ur sh:t cant shoplift at thrifties

redredblood1 7
ismaeljrgomez 6

Hahahahah I was thinking the same thing!!!!!!!

System Of A Down. Epic band. I'm sure you've heard of them.

the_coon_fml 0

o. haha yea my 5 yr old cuz was showin me byob yesterday. i should get some of there songs on my ipod. and do you know y plexico left? he was the best..

noluck84 0

BLASPHEMY! Violent Pornography is my current blast-while-driving-with-windows-down song. System Of A Down never gets old :)

skullbuster 0

@pimpin88 - Honestly, dude, your dick is 6 you are not turning heads in the locker room and the ladies (or guys, depending on how you roll) are not gasping when you drop your pants. Stop lamenting in your longwinded style like some **** sage about how you are so glad you don't have a tiny dick. Yours is average, based on the way you were talking I was expecting you to announce some 12 inch python or something...

mrwilliams 0

You feel bad. to feel badly is to imply that the mechanism that allows you to feel is working poorly.

the_coon, I didn't leave. There was an impostor who used my name but capitalized the initial 'P'. He even stole my picture to make himself even more like me. They booted him. Although my nickname starts with a small 'p', it is the OP that HAS the small 'p'.

brendiz 0

LOL least he wants to help? =P

Unregistered 0

how do you not know that song? lmao calling it fake wow get out often?