Today, I spent 90 dollars and two and a half hours getting my hair done at a fancy salon. As I was unlocking my car, a bird pooped in my hair. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went to a fancy beauty parlor to prepare for my sister's birthday party. The minute I stepped out of the salon, with my hair beautifully trimmed and curled, a bird decided to use it as a toilet. FML
Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML
Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML
Today, I spent 4 hours carefully cleaning the inside and outside of my car. Fairly proud of the job I had done, I parked my car safely in my garage. Later, I opened my garage to find bird shit all over my car. Apparently birds get nervous when they get trapped in garages. FML
Today, I had an outdoor meeting with some important clients. It wasn't until the meeting was over that my coworker decided to inform me that I had bird poop in my hair "pretty much the entire time." FML
Today, a bird took a dump on my truck as I was driving and the wind pushed it into the keyhole. FML
Today, I lost my balance trying to get my bag out of my car. In doing so, my lips came in contact with some bird poop. FML
Today, I discovered that I had left my sunroof open all night during a storm and my front seats was soaked. I grabbed a towel for my seat but didn't close my sunroof because it was nice out. As I pull out of my driveway, I felt something wet hit my forehead. A bird shit on me through my sunroof. FML
Today, I was so totally stressed out at work that I took my car into the park and reclined my seat and shut my eyes. Soon, I noticed the soothing sounds of raindrops on my car and I felt a little better for once. I opened my eyes to see that a bunch of birds had crapped all over my car. FML
Today, just when I thought my day couldn't get any worse, a bird shat on my lunch. FML
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Top comments
alex_vik 1
90 dollars? Two and a half hours? WTF were you getting done?
justme08 0
DAAAYYYYUUUUMMMM that sucks!!!
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Comments (123)
omgitsseejay 0
there are a lot of FMLs that involve bird poop. coincidence? i think birds are trying to **** with us
pimphoe0303 0
why would u waste that much of money and time i bet u still looked like shit
applesaucers 0
Wow @ people saying $90 is too much. Kinda cheap if you ask me. And SHADDUP to people talking about recession and contribute to the Earth crap... why are you sitting on fmylife.com instead of saving the planet and replenishing our pockets? Go away. =/ But anyways, FYL, OP. =(
Chooky_fml 0
This is suprisingly similar to one I submitted a while ago but never got on. Oh well I guess it must happen alot then.
Anonymous485 1
I definitely lol'd. BTW I agree with most people here, $90 is way too much for hair
Kat_MS 0
Yet when people post FMLs saying they screwed up colouring hair on their own, people criticise and go yelling 'YDI for not getting it professionally done'. Guess you can't please everyone, heh.
ArmyOfOne 0
lol @ the tards with their head up their ass. Look around you... must be stuck in some fantasy place in your head. MAD REAL WORLD!! (you know who you are, and no its not the people arguing whether $90 is a lot for getting hair done)
UNHWildcats 0
Shit happens.
stiles_fml 0
good on u #65 so true
zach5 0
Next time, when a bird craps on ur hair, go to it's house and return the favor. (if uve seen family guy, you'll no what I'm talking about)
Mauskau 36
hahahaha that bit's so good. ahahaha. i love peter XD