Speak your mind, but please try and be respectful.

What?

dear bird. could you just not. please.

Birds are a-holes

Damn those birds anyway. If only they weren't so damn cute then maybe I could actually hate them.

birds are creepy

Not all birds are creepy, just like not all birds are cute.

Their cuteness makes up for their behavior it seems

I didn't even see the location at first and I knew it was New York, haha.

maybe your lunch shat in the bird

It's really just gravity's fault when you think about. Had not been for it, then poop couldn't have fell on your lunch.

It's too bad Gravity is responsible for just about anything so quite frankly I'm glad it exists

It's always a bad idea to think that your day can't get worse. You'll only jinx yourself.

I hate birds, I went on a first date and a bird shat on my shoulder, no bueno.

Did you get a second date at least?

That sucks OP. Well, shit happens.

Still I do hope you got to eat some good food.

Sorry op, that's real shitty.

Once OP is done with the rope I'm giving it to you.

I laughed too hard ^ , sorry I just needed to get the obligatory shitty comment out of the way, seems like a right of passage