Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tested out my new paintball gun by firing a few rounds into some thick bushes. Nothing could've prepared me for the angry swarm of hornets whose nest I'd apparently shot. I'm in so much pain. FML
Today, a kid threw a rock at a beehive while my friend and I where standing next to it. It fell down, and a swarm of slightly displeased bees assumed that we were the culprit. Knowing what was about to happen, my friend and I ran for our lives. He ran fast enough to escape; I didn't. The kid, the actual culprit, didn't get attacked. FML
Today, I made a joke about my electric lawnmower sounding like a bunch of angry bees. It was verified when I ran over a beehive in my backyard. FML
Today, I was doing target practice with my new paintball pistol. One of the bullets missed, and hit my new neighbor's house. I went up to the door to apologize, not realizing I was still holding the paintball gun. My ex-soldier neighbor thought I was robbing him and put me in a chokehold. FML
Today, I was at a stop light and a bee landed on my leg. I screamed and started swatting it. It flew into my jacket and I started to strip my jacket off, taking my foot off the brake. I hit the car in front of me and deployed the air bag, breaking my nose. Then the bee stung me in the back. FML
Today, I saved a honey bee from drowning in our pool. It promptly stung me and died. FML
Today, I went to clean my roof when something buzzed by my head and a sting hit my neck. It turns out there's a small nest of, like, five hornets just chilling outside of my window. I found a dead one on the desk in my bedroom. FML
Today, while mowing the lawn, I ran over a hornet's nest. FML
Today, I came home from work to find that my neighbor's trash bins were still on the curb. While returning the bins to her backyard, her kid ran out and shot me with a paintball gun. Multiple times. He thought I was a burglar and ruined my new suit. FML
Today, I was trying to swat a wasp in my bedroom. I got so frustrated that I ended up punching myself in the face. The wasp is still here, and now I look like I've been in a brawl. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
supimnyancat 9
I pressed YDI after I read "Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest."
BountyBass 13
And so you should
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (305)
jillybee101 7
******* imbecile.
SoultheWolf 19
You are a ******* moron. You could have killed someone. Bee allergies are one of the most common allergies (especially one that kills). You could have killed one, if not several people. Even if your neighbor's window wasn't open they still would have gone to the nearest person(s) or animal(s) and attacked them. I hope you get fined, and or sued, for what you did. You selfish prick.
kei1108 13
It's good that you feel guilty! It means you have a soul! At least it was an accident. Good job on being a nice person!
jillybee101 7
Yes such a souls to shoot a paint ball at a hive of innocent bees minding their own business. A true role model they are.
DespairFaction 11
How does feeling bad for doing something stupid make him a nice person. If he was really a nice person he would bring his neighbors some tea and honey in the hospital.
tigrouficele2012 44
Because honey is the first thing they'll want to think about after a bee attack.
DespairFaction 11
It was a joke but yeah...maybe they would.
kei1108 13
P.S. Let this be a lesson on not to be disrespectful to nature. Those bees didnt do anything wrong; they are being bees. Leave them alone.
limblessorphan 4
You have dumb neighbours for leaving their window open. Don't feel bad OP.
Ninjasaurus18 9
Maybe it was summer. Or nice out. An they wanted fresh air. Duh.
laken79 2
Na bro, that's called "winning"
hama806 19
Yes you are a dick! Bee stings can K I L L some people! Leave it to the professionals next time OP or should I say dumb ass?
zxPenguin 0
Today, i shot a paintball gun at a bees nest… *Facepalm *YDI
karen1991 15
You should make them sorry cookies!!
Ugi 27
He should make them a "sorry" gift of his own still-beating heart on a plate. OK, perhaps that's a little harsh but if someone did something idiotic that resulted in me being hospitalised for multiple bee stings I would not be greatly impressed by cookies. Not that I dislike cookies you understand.
spottyblanket 8
Why would you DO THAT?! What if it were a hornets nest? They could have died. If thee had been a baby or young child in the room they would have died. OP why are you shooting a paintball gun in the backyard anyway? I hope this teaches you a lesson. You won't get away with it, so I suggest a card and a gesture at the very least.