Today, I sent a forward to everyone in my phonebook saying, "HOUSE PARTY-NO PARENTS, LOTS OF ALCOHOL, MAYBE A CHANCE TO HOOK UP." I then got a reply from my mom saying, "I'm probably the only one that would show up." Even my mom thinks I'm a loser, and I'm now grounded for 3 weeks. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my mom left for a business trip. Thinking it was a good time to throw a party, I mass messaged everyone on my contact list. I thought it was going to be a success. The problem with this? My mom is on my contacts list. She replied "I'll be home in an hour. You're grounded." FML
Today, I checked my Facebook to find I had been tagged in a bunch of photos from a party I had attended last night. On each picture I had a comment from my mom saying, "You're grounded." FML
Today, my mom added me on Facebook. She wrote on my wall, for the whole world to see, "Why are you swearing on the internet?! You're grounded". FML
Today, I overheard my parents discussing whether or not they could trust me being alone in the house for 2 days. They then came to the decision that I'm too unpopular and unattractive to ever throw a wild party or get laid. FML
Today, my dad grounded me for not having any friends. FML
Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML
Today, I was grounded for not agreeing with an article on dating my mom found in a very strict magazine. The article told parents to monitor phone calls, make rumors about their children cheating on people, and not allow their children anywhere but home. FML
Today, I was house sitting by myself and I texted my mom saying how thankful I was that she was trusting me and not checking up on me. That night I threw a party at the house. My mom showed up to check on me because my text was "suspicious". FML
Today, my parents, who are out of town but driving back tomorrow, called to see how I was doing. They asked if I'd thrown a party in their absence, and I said no. My dad replied, "Well I'm currently looking at pictures on Facebook of our kitchen with beer and a bong on the table." FML
Today, a kid from school came to my house. He asked my dad if I was at home, because we were "planning a bit of the old, you know…" and made an obscene gesture. Now I'm grounded for a month, and no matter what I say, my dad won't believe that I've never even spoken to the kid before. FML
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Top comments
Dashiell 0
Loser, srsly, who is dumb enough to not realize that they have their parents in their contacts?
Shlizabeth 0
I was gonna put some witty comment, but I realized your mom beat me to it.
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Comments (181)
alex_vik 1
There's no way you don't deserve this.
coolpersonxfour 0
I agree with #21 , she`ll be buried in a "Y" shaped coffin .
carrot89 0
#54- lmfao
Moemoemoe_fml 0
Hahahaha, YES!! XD
livngood_fosho 0
i heard its best to think before you act..
Georgia795 0
You're an idiot.
Asavar 0
You're an idiot.
suzieq57 0
I know, really, why hasn't everyone realized yet what a THOROUGHLY BAD IDEA this shit is?
wakingzombies 0
YDI, next time: 1. Take your mom out of your phonebook 2. Send me her number 3. ???? 4. PROFIT
Emwo 0
o: If she did that, she'd lose her mom's number before she gave it to you. (also, it's a girl because it says that in the fml itself )
neonbluezzz10 0
At least it was only 3 weeks. Thats not so bad. But it WAS your fault for not thinking 'hmm, what are the repercussions of my actions?' before sending it...
candiixo 0
is this a girl or guy?
Moemoemoe_fml 0
A girl, that's the worst part. D: With a guy, it would already be ridiculous enough, but with a girl offering sex to the entire phonebook (which she apparently didn't realize she was doing by sending that message, or, worse, maybe she DID realize), the bonus slutty stupidity rises even one bit higher.
abouttofly 12
Wow, I'm used to seeing double standards on this site, but this one's awfully overt.
slaveowner190461 0
ur mom is prolly the only one in ur contacts
TheCashMan88 0
It's kind of hard to be insulting when you type like a retard. I don't know who is more of a dumbass, the OP or you for thinking, "UR" is a word.