Today, I saw an old man who needed help crossing the street. I went over to him and helped him across the street. When he thanked me, I said, "No problem, sir." They responded by hitting me in the happy sacks and screaming that they were a woman. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw a little old lady trying to cross the street. I went over and tried to help her. Turned out she was actually just a really short young woman. As soon as I took her arm, she screamed in front of everyone and accused me of trying to molest her. FML
Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went over and helped her up. Instead of thanking me, she called me a pervert and slapped me around with her cane. FML
Today, I saw an old man struggling with three bags, so I offered to carry them for him. He must not have heard me because when I bent down to take the bags, he thought I was stealing them and punched me in the face. FML
Today, feeling magnanimous, I decided to help a frail-looking old lady across a busy street. She managed to "accidentally" hit me in the balls with her cane no fewer than three times before we reached the other side. FML
Today, I began to walk across the street when I saw a very familiar old lady struggle across it. I walked over to help her, and only after she had blown her rape whistle and socked me in the nuts did she realize I was her grandson. FML
Today, an old lady fell in the street, and I rushed to help her. As I tried to help her to her feet, she started screaming, "She pushed me! She pushed me!" I froze up in shock, and ended up being chased by some guy who thought I'd attacked her. FML
Today, I was at work as a grocery store cashier. I felt a hand slap my ass. Turning around I saw an old man winking at me and I screamed. When my manager came to deal with the problem she didn't believe me and gave the man a $25 gift card for "the trouble" I caused. FML
Today, I saw an elderly woman in need of help of crossing a street. I helped her across. On the way she just about fell and held onto me to keep from hitting the ground. After she left on her bus I reached for my wallet. It was gone. I had just been robbed by a 70 year old. FML
Today, I helped an old man who fell over. Turns out he was drunk and had pissed himself. He decided to thank me with a hug. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a little old lady bumped into me and fell over. I helped her up and she thanked me for being "such a nice young man". It was only an hour later as I was in line at the store that I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet. FML
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Top comments
shankzilla 0
why does everybody and their ******* idiot mother use the words 'happy sacks' on this site. its maybe funny the first time they used it; you deserve everything bad that happens to you for referring to your balls and happy sacks.
anniecook 0
I origionally used balls, but i guess the website just loves to write "happy sacks" i have never used those words in my life, trust me. AND TO EVERYONE ELSE: and im sooo very sorry for that horrible epidemic of "They."i really hope the sky doesnt fall
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Comments (79)
omghehehe 0
Sheesh, not your fault you could see "her" 5 o'clock shadow :D How could you know?
xCrackerx 3
an⋅drog⋅y⋅nous [an-droj-uh-nuhs]: having both masculine and feminine characteristics
WTWNNIL 0
LOL @ everyone getting mad at happy sacks. Anyway yeah I'll still say FYL because nobody deserves to be hit, especially in the groin D:
iFruit 0
I promised in the last FML that if I ever saw another one with the phrase 'happy sacks' I would shoot myself. So thanks, OP.
strata8 0
"They"? O_o
SenGaeriel 3
Happy sacks for testicles....funbags for breasts...pink taco for ******. Anyone else got some good nicknames for body parts?
pattheaninal 9
"Spectacles, testacles, wallet and watch." - Austin Powers.
blastvortex 4
WTF. We've got another OP with multiple scrotums? What's becoming of the world!? Beware the mutant, multiple-sacked army! ヽ(´∇｀)ノ
BikerMike 0
I am sick of "happy sacks". If you get kicked, kneed or punched in your nuts, they are not HAPPY sacks.
AngelRaven89 0
hahah most of these comments are about the term happy sacks rather than the actual FML. And so is mine, happy sack(s?) has to GO! It's much funnier if it would just say "testicles." Also I was confused with the wording "screaming that they were a woman," I thought you were referring to your balls but it didn't make any sense. replace that with "she was" and it would actually make a proper sentence. These FML's really should be better edited.
Sionnach 10
'Happy sack'... Never heard that one before I started looking around FML. It seems to be all over the site.
Sakata_Gintoki 0
Cannot imagine.....