Today, I saw a huge wolf spider in my room. It ran off and hid before I could kill it, but after two hours looking for it then giving up, I finally found it, with my foot, as I put on my shoes. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I tried to have a relaxing soak in the tub. The giant wolf spider that was already in the tub didn't like me trying to set it free outside. It ran right across my feet and back into my house when I dumped it out of a cup outside. I screamed like a little girl. FML
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML
Today, when I was laying in my bed, I looked on the opposite side and saw a spider the size of my palm staring at me. And if that wasn't bad, I found out it hops. I still can't find it. FML
Buggin' out
Today, I reached into my wardrobe to get ready for the day, when something hairy tickled my hand. Imagine my shock seeing a fully-grown wolf spider staring me down from a coat hanger. I grabbed the can of bug spray and let him have it. Half the can later, I now need to re-wash my entire closet. Damn arachnophobia. FML
Leave spiders to chill
Today, I saw a spider in my room. I got a piece of paper to try and put it outside. As I reached, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to smack where the spider was - my face. I fell on the floor disoriented. The spider got away. FML
Act of kindness
Today, I found the same spider which I had let live yesterday hidden in my bath towel. I didn't find it until it was smeared on my face. FML
Been here long?
Today, while I was working from home on my laptop and had my feet up on the coffee table, I felt something on my foot. I looked down to see a spider the size of a quarter on top of my bare foot. It started doing something so I froze, hoping it wouldn't bite me. Instead, it anchored the start of its web to my skin. FML
Adapt, improvise, overcome
Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML
Top comments
leopardwilliam 22
There's only one solution. You need to amputate the foot that touched it. It's the only way.
mattzawesome 28
Something close to that just happened to me! I was in a drive thru when a wasp flew in and landed on the steering wheel. I swore it flew back out but the radiating waves of pain coming from my foot a few minutes later suggested otherwise
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (90)
LibertyLife20 20
That's like my worst fear!
lil_ham1644 29
omg! like no way!
1dvs_bstd 41
OP, don't worry, if I know my comics and movies right, if you got bit, you could be our resident superhero..
miranda9202 15
TARANTULA MAN/WOMAN XD
nyagemini23 22
Oh goodness! that's scary, I'm so afraid of spiders!
KelseyDaBoyz 21
Burn. Everything.
Xeebar 28
Welp. Now you have to burn your house and everything inside down then scrub your foot with acid according to the internet.
Levvy 22
I was mid-eyeroll before I got to the "according to the internet" part, which I think a lot of people missed before downvoting this one.
fakedsincerity 32
Well. I am going barefoot for the rest of my life.
RandomBird 20
These stupid spider jokes aren't funny anymore, and honestly don't make sense since spiders aren't really going to go out of their way to bite you, and if they do you're most likely going to be asleep and not even feel it. Not to mention that spiders are actually good for us, because without them we'd be overrun with bugs that actually cause problems
gothiccookies 10
On the whole I agree, but a wolf spider has a pretty nasty bite, I wouldn't like to find one in my shoe!
Keiraquarium 12
22- It's not like people are choosing to be scared of spiders though. Where I live, there are no dangerous spiders and I know they don't want anything to do with me but I'm still terrified of them. Soon I'm going on a course at a zoo which is designed to help people who are scared of spiders but I'm not sure how well it'll work. I honestly can't help being scared of them.
tencentsakiss 19
#41, it might help. I used to have severe arachnophobia until I was about 18, but after a few years of learning about them and studying them, fascination has taken over. I love spiders now. I can even pick them up in my bare hands. I do stay away from wolf spiders and sac spiders though.. I was bitten by both when I was a kid and they hurt like crazy.
Levvy 22
41 - Your odds are pretty good. People who are literally so scared of them they can't even walk in grass barefoot have come out of treatment programs only lasting a few hours and been able to comfortably handle tarantulas. Granted, tarantulas are generally really easy-going, so handling them isn't exactly taking a big risk (or any risk, really), but they're big and hairy, and most people consider them scarier than most spiders because of that. Hope it goes well for you!
HoboMeth 36
Two hours? Damn
ivanfrombg 13
Spiders, bugs, insects, snakes, all the creepies and crawliies! Welcome to North Carolina haha
Vlen_fml 20
its just a Wolf Spider... i mean their bites can hurt like a mother but they're not that dangerous... in fact they're one of the more common breeds of pet spider.
itsalanis 25
Most definitely! I also have a ton of the jumping spiders in my front yard garden, and those little things are adorable. I can pick those up without any hesitation. c:
Levvy 22
Spiders can be pretty freaky looking, but those tiny jumpers are downright adorable when you get a close look at them. They're like tiny little cats or something.