Kids: Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what...

By Alex - 26/03/2009 04:42 - United States

Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 197

You deserved it 76 851

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 22/08/2013 04:48 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, my little brother grabbed my boobs and wouldn't let go until I pried his hands off. When I told my mom, her response was, "Get over it. He's a little kid who doesn't know any better." He's 14 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 049

You deserved it 3 785

By deerling - 18/03/2019 06:00 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I accidentally farted really loud. My 4 year-old brother heard me and started crying and stopped talking to me for a whole hour. Now he tells everyone about "that time his sister farted." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 938

You deserved it 342

By I don't know, son - 16/11/2013 01:53 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was lying beside my 5-year-old son to help him get to sleep. He turned his head and asked, "Daddy, why do you suck so much?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 847

You deserved it 4 781

By Anonymous - 17/09/2014 21:57 - United States - Dewitt

Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 561

You deserved it 4 700

By Anonymous - 23/02/2013 06:28 - United States - Calhan

Today, my brother accidentally hit me in the throat. After I stopped coughing, choking, and feeling like I was going to die, he came back into my room, quietly said "I know your weakness," and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 571

You deserved it 3 452

By Username - 29/07/2011 23:36 - United States

Today, my younger brother and I got into a fight over who the favorite child is. My mom overheard, came in the living room and said, "It's your little brother, now shut up." She was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 334

You deserved it 7 350

By Anonymous - 29/03/2013 01:13 - United States - Sunnyvale

Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 203

You deserved it 18 846

Little shit

By moneyman22 - 01/03/2010 19:09 - United States

Today, I was asked to take care of my 3 year-old little brother. After 15 minutes of him screaming and me trying to keep him entertained, he started throwing his toy cars at me. He hit me in the mouth, and I started to bleed. My parents yelled at me for "not controlling him." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 481

You deserved it 3 966

By mr.palendrome - 06/03/2009 02:27 - United States

Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 438

You deserved it 28 105

Little twit

By Anonymous - 22/03/2009 03:38 - United States

Today, my 7 year-old brother asked me what "horny" meant whilst in the car with my parents. When I wouldn't tell him what it meant he screamed, "I'm getting horny!" at the top of his lungs, and told my parents that I told him to say it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 742

You deserved it 7 132

theauthor 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 12:05

LOL i had a similar experience when my 3 1/2 yr old cousin told me sadly that "tomas the tank engine is shit"

Cogeno 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 12:51

I remember my 9 year old nephew recently got suspended for telling the teacher to 'Go suck her husband' after she was giving him shit.

Comments

theauthor 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 12:05

LOL i had a similar experience when my 3 1/2 yr old cousin told me sadly that "tomas the tank engine is shit"

fuzz97 23

Thursday 4 February 2010 3:57

GiddyXD 0

Friday 12 March 2010 9:24

lol!!!

PlasticShark 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 12:06

Haha, my hero.

oliv34 11

Sunday 21 June 2015 6:40

the 90s called they want their hairstyle back

roar__ 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 12:15

That's the greatest thing I've heard in a while.

emorockerownage 9

Thursday 26 March 2009 12:19

w000t

RyeBreadBoy 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 12:28

hahaha hilarious. you should teach him snappy comebacks on purpose just to amuse yourself.

Jimboom 11

Thursday 26 March 2009 12:29

Lol. The kid is well on his way to being one of the cool kids. Now, if you could just get him smoking and drinking he will REALLY be advanced for his age.

kateRAWR 4

Saturday 21 April 2012 17:49

U got that one right

jimmy_vansuelo 10

Wednesday 23 October 2013 16:30

You shouldn't ever have kids...

ml_augustus 23

Sunday 3 July 2016 9:23

Wow great advice

arby 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 12:34

I forget the context, but I told my mother about something that happened that really sucked, her response? "that sucks... That sucks the big one." I was in a state of shock.