By wayne - 07/12/2011 10:28 - New Zealand

Today, I overcame my fear of swimming in lakes and went for a swim. I got bitten by an eel. FML
I agree, your life sucks 34 654
You deserved it 3 542

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I refuse to swim in any natural body of water. Been like that since I was a kid. Too many variables - fish, vegetation, rocks, dead things... I'll take a swimming pool any day.

every1luvsboners 11

You're lucky it didn't swim up in your urethra. This happened to me years ago. I still feel a burning sensation every time I piss.

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I thought eels were in the ocean. Nonetheless, sorry OP. Stick to pools next time.

jwade11 12

An eel? Damn what luck you have!!! I don't like swimming in lakes either. Along with fish, feces, etc.... It just doesnt sound appealing to swim around in that combination. You should have stuck with your instincts and stayed away from that nasty water!

eel? haha. never seen one in a lake before

You're lucky it wasn't a lake shark.

KiddNYC1O 20

Bull shark territory.

Watched Jason Voorhees too much eh? ch-ch-ch-ch ah-ah-ah-ah.

ceilingfans 1

I used to be an eel, then I took an arrow to the knee.

eels dont have knees -Grammar Nazi Inbound-

There are fresh water eels, they creep me out man

n_epic_fail 14

Sharks, eels, leaches, fish, and other creatures out for human flesh all swimming in one big body of water... Back to swimming at the local pool.

shanemaximo 7

63: Epic skyrim win. Yes, I did see what you did there.

1- There are freshwater eels. Still as nasty as any other you come across.

BoredReader88 5

1- freshwater eels are also some of the larger eels, Jeremy wade caught some on river monsters :)

Reminds me of this dumbass kid who thought that jellyfish lived in our local lake.

deepunder 17

I didnt know that eels bite. Seems like a fish or leech is more likely to.

I refuse to swim in any natural body of water. Been like that since I was a kid. Too many variables - fish, vegetation, rocks, dead things... I'll take a swimming pool any day.

So you'd rather have contained bodily fluids like sweat, piss, and spit? You know those little kids don't always hold it.

you think the big guys bother to hold?

I sure don't! :P

m0tl3ycru3 0

I don't want to live on this planet anymore

Carbonation 0

7 - Yes I would rather swim in that. Chances are swimming in a pool with kids pee and spit is a LOT more safe then a lake with unknown bacteria, dead rodents, fungus, etc.

Swimming in a lake is much more satisfying than a pool.

gabrielbaby 9

Are you forgetting that chlorine is in most god damn pools to kill the bacteria and viruses that come from people and elsewhere?

The chlorine in the pool reacts with bodily fluids to produce poisonous chemicals. Almost every body of water is safer than a swimming pool, unless you find jellyfish.

nixter5 18

I'm a lifeguard, and I know for a fact that if you swim in a pool for an hour, you consume 1/10th of a liter of urine and other bodily fluids. Yumm.

The_Troller 14

Well a couple weeks ago my school had a mandatory poolwater test and the results showed that besides water, the most common substances are "make up" and "vaginal discharges". (LOLWUT?) so I guess it's a "pick your poison" kind of situation.

thiscrazything 1

Damn, after reading all this, I don't want to swim anywhere anymore.

Wow. I dont think i'll ever want to swim anywhere after reading this.

I think after reading this thread I will limit all future swim-scapades to my bathtub... *Sings* "Rubber ducky, you're the one..."

Bekeliyr 10

not every pool has chlorine. I've been in pools where they used Na and UV lights. more satisfying than chlorine and salty pools.

Don't be a pussy. Having swam in lakes, marshes, rivers, and oceans, I can safely say that the odds of anything happening to you are next to none, just don't be an idiot when in a natural body of water. OP just got very, very unlucky.

SpeshulK 0

Found human... Droppings in the ocean just 3 days ago. I just moved to the other side of the bay

Metal_Chick 15

I got head lice when I was little in my elementary school's pool. My mom forbid me to swim there again after that incident; I had to sit and watch everyone else swim and have fun for the rest of the summer. *sigh* :(

After reading this thread, I look back at the time I accidentally swallowed the pool water while having weekly swims and am going to puke now.

I wanna thumbs up but it's at 69. How immature of me.

deepunder 17

Time to quit swimming

You can check that off the bucket list

rawrautumnz 7

define "bucket list". :c I've heard that term before but never understood.

A bucket list is a list of things someone wants to do before they die.

...die, or in other words, "kick the bucket"

Hey, at least it wasn't an eel-ectric shock! Excuse me while I go clean my mouth out with caustic soda.

every1luvsboners 11

You're lucky it didn't swim up in your urethra. This happened to me years ago. I still feel a burning sensation every time I piss.

You might wanna get that checked out.

ikickgingers 15

The burning sensation isn't from the Eel. O.o

Baha I "clap" my hands to that.

ikickgingers 15

Drip, drip, drip?

Chlamydia?

rexgar2000 10

H to the I to the motherfucking V!

when will people learn gonorrhea is the clap. it is called this because the treatment used to be to rod the penis of discharge by taking both hands and clapping like a huge zit

kristengray 4

That was on river monsters!!! :)

You were just at the wrong place at the wrong time...

I have never seen an eel in a lake. Did you mean to say a snake? Maybe it was just a really ugly fish? Either way don't let it bother you, go for another swim.

Fun fact: NZ has a couple of freshwater eels that live in lakes (but said lakes are connected to the sea)....

Yeah from what I understand in New Zealand they have many lakes that are full of eels (not like this in North America)

Jeremy Wade is a renowned fisherman who goes to places based on stories and myths. He went to NZ on stories of eels biting people and dragging them under the water, thus killing them. Armed with razor-sharp teeth which prevent escape, New Zealand Longfin Eels spin and tear off bits of flesh like a crocodile. And they are indeed aggressive towards people.

Here in Australia basically any where there's water there is eels, it's terrible. Same in NZ...

No he means an eel dipshit -.- , we have tem here in nz

Don't worry you're not the only one deathly afraid of swimming in non-heavily-chlorinated bodies of water. :D Though I didn't know eels lived in lakes, must be a New Zealand thing.

every1luvsboners 11

Edit: Never mind, that was rude.

If you got bitten by an eel in a lake, I don't want to know what would happen if you were to swim in the ocean..

Release the kraken!

jeob1992 8

I was gonna put some witty comment... But I just feel bad for op that really must of been a shocking experience...of all the times people go without eels....

jeob1992 8

Why is my comment being downed