By CassidyQueen - 06/06/2015 02:14 - United States - Warrenton

Today, I moved in with my boyfriend because my parents kicked me out. He said that if I ever touch his "fucking apple jacks" he will "chop" my nipples off and feed them to the dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 149
You deserved it 5 537

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Well I wouldn't let you touch my apple jacks either

Well shit. I hope he wasn't serious.

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Well shit. I hope he wasn't serious.

He probably was, let's be honest Apple Jacks are addictive as crack Apple cracks

Maybe he keeps his drugs in the apple jacks box? I think you're onto something #13. Doesn't want her finding out how he makes his dough.

Haha OP that's bloody hilarious. It's just so fun when the person you live with and fall asleep next to threatens to sever parts of your body to be fed to the dog. Seriously though, if he seemed oddly in rage when he said it, he might have just given you a peek at his true colours.

Apple Jacks are serious business.

I don't think OP should find out if he was serious

Well guys you know what they say: Home-Sweet-Home.

I doubt he was serious. I seriously hope not.

If so then this could get very ugly.

Apple Jacks are serious business.

He was probably serious about her not touching his cereal. I hate it when roommates eat my food.

Well I wouldn't let you touch my apple jacks either

I'm cuckoo for Apple jacks!!! wait shit wrong cereal still not sharing any of my Apple jacks though

If any of you fuckers..touch my lucky charms, I'll bash your skull in with my pot of gold and then feed you to count chocula.

Lucky Charms look like cat food with marshmallows.

You have now effectively ruined luckey charms for me for the rest of my life...

There is always cinnamon toast crunch.

Plot twist! She got kicked out of her parents house because she touched their apple jacks.

I'm repping cornflakes! Does that make me old?

how about booty pebbles?

#49 it's ok cuz nobody eats the cat food anyway. #idoitforthemallows

I actually hate the marshmallows

Well, if you want a place to live, guess you can't eat any apple jacks.

Technically she can. She won't be able to tell if it's cold outside anymore though.

Lucky Charms from here on out.

You don't know what happens when you touch a man's Apple Jacks, do you?

I know what happens when a man touches my Apple Jacks.. Death.

Are we still talking about cereal here or...?

We were talking about cereal?

Wow, he doesn't fuck around when it comes to cereal. FYL

You can touch my apple jacks. Really though, that's fucked

Either he has a really sick sense of humor, or he has some serious problems... :/

You must've never eaten Applejacks

Not sure if that's innuendo or not…

Pretty sure it's not

Well then, don't touch his Apple jacks!