Today, I missed my flight because I was stopped by airport security. They found "small, suspicious, spherical objects" in my purse on the X-ray. After pulling me out of line, taking my purse aside and carefully opening it with tongs, they removed the bag of grapes I had packed as a snack. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML
Today, I borrowed a friend's suitcase for a trip. At the airport, security pulled me aside because there was a small metal object inside. I opened the suitcase expecting something suspicious and found a potato peeler. My friend had used the suitcase for groceries the week before. FML
Today, after visiting my mom, she stuffed a bunch of pads in my backpack so I'd have some at my dorm. When I was going through security, I was stopped and ended up missing my flight. Apparently the jumbo pads my mom sent look exactly like packs of cocaine when they go through the X-ray machine. FML
Today, I packed my bags and left for the airport. When I passed through security, the X-ray scanner discovered that my cat had also come along for the ride. FML
Today, while going through airport security the lady asked why I folded everything so small. I said that I was going away for a month and needed to fit a lot of stuff in only one bag. She smiled, nodded and then dumped my luggage to search for "drugs and other illegal teen things." FML
Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML
Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year-old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML
Today, I missed my flight because I was held in airport security because I'd "threatened" an employee. He had confiscated my eyelash curler and jokingly I asked if he thought I was going to curl him to death. He didn't laugh. FML
Today, while going through customs at the airport, my bag was selected for screening. It was nearly overflowing because it was so full, so before the TSA agent searched it, I said, "Watch out - it's going to explode when you open it". Wrong choice of words. FML
Today, my mother-in-law had concealed in her suitcase a kitchen knife and plastic bags of MSG, salt, and other seasonings (AKA unidentified white powder) because she doesn’t trust foreign food, and wanted to cook her own food on holiday. Airport security were not amused and we missed our flight. FML
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Top comments
dino_witha_cape 0
yeah, if you bite into those things they could squirt someone's eye out
Jcsati8 0
If you pack baby carrots, will they think you are carrying ammo? Damn airport security!
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Comments (203)
catatonicsleep 17
One time I was flying to Italy, in the box for confiscated sharp things (scissors, razors etc) there was a banana....
teehee520 0
Thank you for not using proceeded. :)
paxromana 0
Continental flights allow produce and cheese, et cetera. If the OP is from the U.S., for example, they couldn't be flying to Hawaii with the grapes. But if they were going from coast to coast, then yes, they could take the grapes. And for people wondering why this is an FML, it does say s/he missed the flight.
desso 0
Well, the real question here is did they give the grapes back? If they didn't, that's the real FML. Grapes are ******* delicious.
Emico_fml 0
Airport security suck. I once had a tiny bottle of hotel sized shampoo confiscated (which left me without soap for an entire week), whilst my friend had 3 cans of coke in her bag that went undetected. It was retarded. FYL indeed.
chelsea_pratt 0
huh... happened to me once cause the security thought I have a gun, but it turned out to be my blackberry curve, so i almost missed my flight to Boston :O LOL last november, i went to Vancouver from San Fransico and my grandma made me the lasguna and I brought it to Vancouver and the security didn't arrest me. so what is the point ?? :P
paks7 0
wow you people really don't fly much do you? Before you go criticizing this person for not knowing the rules...maybe you should learn them? yes you can bring outside food, no you can't bring outside drinks I fly all the time.
skierdude 0
TSA is the biggest waste of taxpayer money.
Anex_fml 0
To quote and answer the person complaining about copying from VDM. If you look at the top right of the page you will see and English/French option. VieDeMerde is in fact the FIRST and original site. They later translated it to English for the FML site. There has been already many instances were some from the French version were copied onto the English version of the site and vice versa. Now on to the grapes... you ARE allowed to pack food.. even when traveling to another country. I recently went from France to the US for Christmas. They frisked my 6 month old baby, and freaked out over my guitar hero controller. NO ONE is out of suspicion. At the time I thought it was ridiculous.. and then I heard about someone smuggling cocaine in a baby diaper the other day...
24788 7
they just wanted the food.