Today, I'm on the last day of my honeymoon in Ireland. My wife and I have an amazing hotel room and a huge bed. She's passed out drunk and if I even touch her, she needs the bucket next to our bed. So much for finishing our week on a "fun" note. FML
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Today, we are on our honeymoon, at a beautiful resort, and my wife has been in bed crying for two days. She won't talk to me, and every time I come in, she sobs harder and starts hyperventilating. This can't be a good sign. FML
Today, after a very long day, I needed a hotel room but the only one available was a honeymoon suite. I was so tired, I just said yes. My wife just called demanding to know why I was charging a romantic room to our joint credit card, and if I’ve got a woman with me. I just want to go to sleep. FML
Today, I woke up from my honeymoon to discover the love of my life is a bed wetter. FML
Today, it's the last day of my girlfriend's "dream vacation", which I broke the bank paying for. She's spent almost the entire week laying in bed, listlessly playing Pokémon. She won't even talk to me. FML
Today, my fiancée decided to go on a "vacation." Our wedding is tomorrow. FML
Today, after a long night of partying, I fell asleep, while my bride was delivering her vows. FML
Today, I'm exhausted. For the second time, my fiancé and I have pulled my future sister-in-law off the pavement naked and drunk at 3 a.m. and couldn't find the purse or glasses she had with her. She’s hungover and has completely blacked out what happened. Never again giving her a place to crash. FML
Today, my boyfriend got a hotel room with a jacuzzi, drinks, and tickets to Six Flags for my birthday. He is currently passed out drunk on the other side of the bed, cursing me out in his sleep. FML
Today, my wife got so drunk she kissed another guy when the ball dropped. FML
Today, my boyfriend came home, chugged a beer, and passed out in our bed without saying hello or goodnight to me. I've been on vacation for a week and was hoping to cuddle. But no, if I try to touch him, he hits me and growls. FML
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Top comments
nchic01 17
well if you drink like the Irish you have to face the consequences! sorry op
lifein2014 13
what he really meant was so much for the pussy she promised me tonight Lol
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Comments (87)
Ginacxx 4
Sounds like *she* had fun. Lol
worldclassrager 41
It's luckily the last day not like the first but still that it happened it's the luck of the Irish...maybe a four leaf clover might have brought you two a bit more luck when things started up
schhichick 14
She should not have been Dublin the drink orders.
ashtulla95 12
Typical.... Instead of trying to get off, why don't you get her some tea and take care of her for once. Ya goof.
countryb_cth 38
Probably because she is passed out drunk and would throw it up anyway. Plus usually the honeymoon does mean having sex
Batmans_cat 14
i have to agree with #40, it is there honeymoon, what do you think its for, milking cows??
stargirl_95 24
Clearly OP is taking care of her. It's not unreasonable for him to have wanted to have sex on his honeymoon but I'm sure he would have been happy to at least spend quality time with her if she wasn't up to it. You can't exactly spend quality time with someone who's passed out drunk.
davincidasecond 24
Wow ... Too many dumb assumptions in one post.
sarah2144 14
That's Ireland for you. I'm not normally a huge drinker and I got drunk almost every night I was there.
frickinontario 3
The flight home is going to suck...
quickfingers100 15
Sounds like a classic end to a honeymoon :)
JRtheSnowman 5
That kinda sucks and I feel bad but it's Ireland what did you expect?
Zm90 5
best of luck for next time. use ur hands :d
elixaaaaa 13
Here's your chance to come good on your promise "in sickness and in health". She feels worse than you do so suck it up and be a good husband and take care of her
vikky538 29
you should have taken advise from locals..on how to have fun with drunken wives...
mageepaigeee44 15
Yea.. Because rape jokes are funny..
siggy_mcsigx 22
that is not fun, that is rape