Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not joking when he threatens to shave your eyebrows if you don't let him watch cartoons. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I discovered that you can't always assume your little brother is kidding when he says that you have a spider on top of your head. FML
Today, I was napping when my little brother cut off huge chunks of my hair. He thought it would turn me into the older brother he always wanted. He's 8. FML
Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML
Today, I was sitting on the couch with my little brother. He was looking at me and says "so cool." I asked him what was so cool and he says "it's not that cool but, your eyebrow connects to your other eyebrow". FML
Today, I playfully drew thick eyebrows on my one-year-old son to make him look like a cartoon villain. He laughed cutely in the mirror as I took some adorable pictures. When my husband saw, he threw such a horrendous fit about boys and makeup, I was reduced to tears. FML
Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML
Today, it's been a week since my little brother took up his new hobby of posting "cool story, bro" in reply to almost every Facebook status and comment that I make. Not only do I already want to smash his face against a brick wall, my parents will ground me if I defriend any family members. FML
Today, my brother let his kids watch anime without even looking at what they chose. He assumed it was OK because it’s just foreign cartoons. He is now blaming me for his kids' trauma, because I wasn’t there to warn him that "The Promised Neverland" isn’t just a Peter Pan rip off. IF YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW. FML
Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML
Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Freeze_fml 17
Someone answered their own question.
_Vamp_ 9
And you can't either gangsta beiber. It's past your bed time you silly goose.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (129)
iggz 0
lol, the only right thing to do is shave his too, and then both go walk around town
bizarre_ftw 22
Show him that you're not joking when you threaten to trade him in for a new & better adopted brother
ohmandapants 17
Kids are the future...of all that is evil.
bms1996 12
better get an eyebrow pencil!!
MrLoux 6
Hang him from his thumbs!
fadingfaith 4
Get bangs and draw them back in.
bunnixbrutality 5
Op if i didnt get my adventure time in and i was him i would have shaved more then your eyebrows D;
divine69 0
Get him back, Wax his eyebrows
TheWindowLicker 13
59- sounds like courage the cowardly dog to me, but I could be mistaken.
swampbilly 5
I'd Bruce lee kick em in the chest