Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not joking when he threatens to shave your eyebrows if you don't let him watch cartoons. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I discovered that you can't always assume your little brother is kidding when he says that you have a spider on top of your head. FML
Today, I was napping when my little brother cut off huge chunks of my hair. He thought it would turn me into the older brother he always wanted. He's 8. FML
Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML
Today, I was sitting on the couch with my little brother. He was looking at me and says "so cool." I asked him what was so cool and he says "it's not that cool but, your eyebrow connects to your other eyebrow". FML
Today, I playfully drew thick eyebrows on my one-year-old son to make him look like a cartoon villain. He laughed cutely in the mirror as I took some adorable pictures. When my husband saw, he threw such a horrendous fit about boys and makeup, I was reduced to tears. FML
Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML
Today, it's been a week since my little brother took up his new hobby of posting "cool story, bro" in reply to almost every Facebook status and comment that I make. Not only do I already want to smash his face against a brick wall, my parents will ground me if I defriend any family members. FML
Today, my brother let his kids watch anime without even looking at what they chose. He assumed it was OK because it’s just foreign cartoons. He is now blaming me for his kids' trauma, because I wasn’t there to warn him that "The Promised Neverland" isn’t just a Peter Pan rip off. IF YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW. FML
Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML
Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML
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Top comments
Freeze_fml 17
Someone answered their own question.
_Vamp_ 9
And you can't either gangsta beiber. It's past your bed time you silly goose.
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Comments (129)
joy_nash 7
you must shave his head in retaliation. it is the only way.
pepperedmint 0
Smart little kid
mosweezey 3
Oh I feel your pain. My brother once got mad at me for not letting him sit on my lap and I ended up with stitches dangerously close to my eye.
mwoods2293 0
pee on him when he is sleeping,
Cmcnab1997 0
That's not the only thing that's hairless
vinathi 9
I think I'm in love with your brother.
Duckinci 2
im sorry but i think you are missing the ******* point. once you shave your eyebrows, they dont grow back as they were before. the grow back even more sparse. tell your parents to sell that shit brother of yours.
lolmigosh 15
Just pencil them back the way they were;)
funnynesh 10
My little sister did that to me once. When I say once, I mean when I was 10… I was teased for sooo long...
iBiteRoses 22
Well firstly, my brother has never threatened me with such a thing, and even if he did make that threat, he wouldn't actually do it. You should have probably not said it was everyone else's little brother, lol.