lick my blowjob

He's just tryna have fun.

peeing in kitchen plants... the regar old American dream

ahahhahahagha!!

Really? That sounds more like my birthday!

Fyl. All my dad wants to do today is chill.

Wow, I wonder what mother's day is like in your family.

He have his style!

Hey, pee is good for plants. It carrys nitrogen and other minerals, helping the plant be more robust, AND your father is reducing water pollution by putting his piss to good use. You have a lot to learn from your father and you would be wise to follow in his footsteps. ... just kidding OP, this FML is pretty sad :(

#38 yeah man! Ammonia is super good for plants!! ;)

France.... and fyl that's gross

in my family fathers day mean both my dad and my mom coming home at 3am drunk telling me and my brother not to worry if they die that night. then my dad passes out on the floor while my mom falls in her own puke, saying it smells bad. I'm so serious this happened last year lol

best father ever

38 - good point X-D

Well, at least my family is normal, day at the park for the past few hours and now were making corn on the cob. Indeed an fml for OP, your dad has issues

I'm flying all day, I don't even get to see my daddy til tomorrow :(

Ms_Jessie, are you like a celebrity in FML? You know everyone and everyone seems to know you

If you go on FML often enough people know who you are, like me and her and a few others

This fml was worded lamely. You're lame.

lol classic

...whens Fathers Dsy? My mum and dad havent said anything about it.

ahhh the glories of papas

yup (I hate antiflood) (I hate it more now) (now this is just getting evil)

it's fathers day! he puts up with your crap the other 364 days out of the year, so let him do whatever the fuck he wants!

Haha celebrity? No. Although glamour whore (as I've been called) does seem almost synonomous with that. I just come on here often enough to recognize most people and be recognized in turn. Loren's more of a 'celeb' than me. He's sure been around longer.

ydi for not sayin no

OP, I wanna hear what he does on his birthday next.

aww sorry op that sucks.. hate it when my dad is drunk..

I am a celebrity. Show us your bra.

Freeze- You wish :P

Shoulda used his toothbrush to scrub his toe jam. He wouldn't know the difference.

I agree, it is his day, I'm sure you can deal for one day. My dad just wants us to leave him alone and let him watch his sports on father's day. =P

getting drunk? peeing in plants? foot massages? I want to party with op's father!

Or just throw out the toothbrush when you're through.

Gahh, *his

-.- I was just about to correct you, just my luck. :P

Like I'm just going to let you do that? :P I'm glad I caught it in time.

Fathers day us only once a year bur he can be drunk whenever