Today, I had to renew my driver's license at the DMV. Earlier, I was in a play and was still covered in stage makeup. I didn't realize that not all of it had come off until after my picture was taken and put on my new license. For the next three years, I'll be the guy with the dark eyeliner. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally went to the DMV to replace my lost license. After waiting for almost two hours, I casually rummaged through my purse. Something strange inside the lining caught my eye. It was my license. FML
Today, I finally got my ass into gear and went to the DMV to renew my driver's license. I waited in line for over two hours, only to find out that I had brought my library card instead of my license. FML
Today, I went to the DMV today and sat in line for over 6 hours to renew my driver's license. Even though with the pandemic, it's been extended to New Year's Eve but I decided to get it done and over with. I get called up to finish everything, only to find out my license is suspended. FML
Today, I got my renewed driver's license. It clearly indicates 'Sex: F'. My beard and penis beg to differ. FML
Today, it was good fun getting a nice vampire make-up at my drama lesson. It would've been better if I hadn't forgotten my Demak'up. Even better if I could've avoided the crazy glances in the bus home. FML
Today, yet again I got delayed in airport security. One month ago, I thought it was a good idea to wear make-up when renewing my passport. It turns out I look nothing like myself without makeup. Hello shattered confidence and 5 years of needing to wear makeup for every flight. FML
Today, I went to the DMV to get my license. I almost ran over my evaluator as he was walking to get in the car. FML
Today, I spent two hours finding, gathering, and printing documentation to go to the DMV to get my real ID. Makeup, hair, everything done, on my way there. They’re closed today. FML
Today, I watched a grizzled old gas station attendant, with a stain on her blouse, use my driver's license to pick something out of her teeth. FML
Today, the DMV told me I had to pay a $39 "renewal" fee for a mistake they made. After over an hour of waiting, they printed a license without a Real ID star like my previous one. Then they tried to blame me for not asking for one. I didn't have time to resolve this two weeks ago, and now Pennsylvania says it's my fault. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ReinaJay 13
Sexy
substitutes 0
Better have rocked that shit
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (129)
Ilikeurfmls 13
It was probably sexy;)
JukeboxValkyrie 19
At least you aren't the guy with a black eye.
capnbzarr 43
Actually that would be kinda cool (having it on your license, not getting punched in the face).
tc34 1
Yeah I'd rather have a two black eyes than that for 3 years
jfkeith31B 10
All you gotta say is that you went and kicked it at the Neverland ranch for the day.
bri1215 7
i think that guys with eyeliner are amazing and sexy
bri1215 7
i think that guys with eyeliner are amazing and sexy
chickenwalrus 14
Eye hope nobody lashes out at them. they shouldn't feel the need to masquerade themselves though. Hopefully people won't be lining up to makeup fun of them.
Wayne913 13
If anyone asks, say " you should have seen the other guy."
perdix 31
The last time I went to the DPS (that's the DMV in Texas), the told me not to smile so much. A girl was sending me dirty texts while I waited in line.
YummyBubbles08 0
...and how did she get your number..?
YummyBubbles08 0
And how did she get your number...?
iam_yummylicious 12
No it's not. Chuck E Cheese has it beat.
perdix 31
Cuz I gave it to her. I like dirty texts -- who doesn't?
RuCheezBurger 10
Say you were Emo/Goth for Halloween and tell anyone who sees it that you took it then.
haw008 14
The date that your license is issued is actually on your license good try but.... No.
RuCheezBurger 10
Works with friends?
liir 18
Just look at it this way, it is an incentive for you to not get pulled over.