Health: Today, I got food poisoning at work. I had my head in the toilet...

By cedechan - 29/09/2012 04:08 - United States - Tucson

Today, I got food poisoning at work. I had my head in the toilet when the auto flush decided to turn on. The force of the flush was so powerful half of what I threw up splashed back into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 707

You deserved it 2 470

Health

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

buys case of Listerine

By Sick Guy - 24/03/2018 20:30 - United States - Boynton Beach

Today, I wasn't feeling well at work. While I was in the bathroom losing my lunch, a very large piece of food came up. The resulting splash of toilet water went straight up into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 930

You deserved it 348

By Anonymous - 31/10/2009 19:40 - United Kingdom

Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 754

You deserved it 6 741

By sicktomystomach - 02/05/2009 17:05 - United States

Today, during lunch at school, a wave of nausea came over me. I ran to the bathroom and made it just in time. As I was throwing up, I set off the toilet's automatic flush and my vomit came flying back into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 682

You deserved it 5 209

By Woody - 06/10/2018 14:00 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I went to take a dump at work, but the last person in the stall didn't flush. As I flushed for him, the shitty water splashed on my face. Some went in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 677

You deserved it 390

TW: Gross

By mpfrost153 - 01/11/2021 12:00 - United States

Today, as if having diarrhea at work wasn’t bad enough, my office’s aggressively flushing toilet sprayed me with my own liquid shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 122

You deserved it 118

By Preggo - 10/12/2016 01:51

Today, I vomited so hard into the toilet that the water splashed back into my face. I instinctually moved away only to finish puking on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 585

You deserved it 841

In and out

By newhostess - 11/04/2009 16:12 - United States

Today, I was training for my new job at a restaurant. As part of training, they give you free food so you know what to recommend, and the dish I got was really good. Eight hours later I saw it again while I was puking. I got food poisoning from my own workplace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 995

You deserved it 3 412

By Anonymous - 06/06/2015 04:20 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I have food poisoning. My boss told me that if I didn't come into work, I'd be fired. Not 30 minutes after sitting down, I sneezed and shat my pants. My boss still won't let me leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 912

You deserved it 2 184

Hot lava from both ends

By SickBoi - 30/03/2021 14:01 - United States - Cambridge

Today, I was suffering from food poisoning and had constant diarrhea, along with feeling nauseous. I couldn't hold my vomit in and rushed to the toilet, but due to the pressure, I pooped while still in pajamas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 961

You deserved it 86

By monkeywrench - 30/08/2015 11:29 - Sweden

Today, I was hit by acute food poisoning while attending a colleague's birthday party at his home. The toilet had a door that wouldn't close all the way, there were only three sheets of toilet paper left, and I had to walk home through town, in a dress, with my soiled underwear in a plastic bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 962

You deserved it 1 781

DocBastard 38

Saturday 29 September 2012 12:33

That wasn't food poisoning, dear. It's morning sickness. Congratulations on behalf of the FML family.

nanpooo 6

Saturday 29 September 2012 12:05

Oh gross. I hope you were able to be excused from work.

Comments

skulltorn 8

Saturday 29 September 2012 12:04

First!

Sinandraide 4

Saturday 29 September 2012 12:05

mhhm delicious :/

katieeamberr 2

Saturday 29 September 2012 16:43

You're disgusting

juliee_xd 3

Saturday 29 September 2012 22:22

LMAOOO XD

nanpooo 6

Saturday 29 September 2012 12:05

Oh gross. I hope you were able to be excused from work.

perdix 29

Saturday 29 September 2012 13:23

They probably sent her on retroactive vacation. In this tough economy, ...

EvilPotato 14

Saturday 29 September 2012 12:06

Well, the toilet water probably tasted better than vomit. However that is seriously nasty.

cliffibom 15

Saturday 29 September 2012 15:10

What the ****? OP's incident was just plain disgusting, no one wants toilet bowl water mixed with vomit on their face.

BAMitsnikki 8

Saturday 29 September 2012 12:06

I can only imagine what it might have sounded like to other people in the same toilet...

Wheredidgrungego 12

Saturday 29 September 2012 12:11

Gives new meaning to the word "upchuck."

Jaxx66 21

Saturday 29 September 2012 16:50

I'm thinking that OP got a swirly. Damn, never thought someone would be so masochistic.

DocBastard 38

Saturday 29 September 2012 12:33

That wasn't food poisoning, dear. It's morning sickness. Congratulations on behalf of the FML family.

PipingMouse 14

Saturday 29 September 2012 13:58

Do you want a boy or a girl? :P

Tuffay 14

Saturday 29 September 2012 15:41

Can we name it? Can we name it?

gc327072 30

Saturday 29 September 2012 17:32

"Next time, on 'I didn't know I was pregnant'.......... ".

EagorLuvsBigFoot 8

Sunday 30 September 2012 3:51

I think his name should be Randall (:

rayahbug 3

Saturday 29 September 2012 12:36

My god. That was by far, the grossest thing I've ever read.

zandalee 19

Saturday 29 September 2012 13:17

You need to read more FML's then.

mpalmiter 0

Saturday 29 September 2012 14:09

8- You obviously didn't read the Fml where the girl went to bite her boyfriends neck and had a zit pop in her mouth.

Tuffay 14

Saturday 29 September 2012 15:43

The mold in the fat rolls is fairly gross as well.

aKaClickZ 4

Saturday 29 September 2012 18:05

Don't forget the one where the dentist had a booger drop in the OP's mouth.

NeonPopRocks 14

Saturday 29 September 2012 20:08

24- That made me gag and almost puke in my mouth.

KiddNYC1O 20

Saturday 29 September 2012 22:40

8- You must be new to the Internet...

lyflycat9297 4

Wednesday 3 October 2012 3:02

God, give the guy a break, will ya? He's just stating his opinion, no need to go ballistic on him or that...

loloalltheway 23

Saturday 29 September 2012 12:47

That is DISGUSTING, poor you OP, poor you ...

perdix 29

Saturday 29 September 2012 12:50

That's Management's way of saying, "Get sick on your own time."

Keywords

ADHD Work Mental health Health Relatable Anger issues Parenting Kids Family Awkward Funerals Love Lonely AITA Weird Break-ups Parents Food Miscellaneous Annoying Cooking Gross Music Transportation Road rage Plumbing Party Surprise Cute Christmas

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Same thing different taste

*buys case of Listerine*

TW: Gross

In and out

Hot lava from both ends

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buys case of Listerine