Today, I got beaten up by my ex-girlfriend's older brother who does mixed martial arts, because my ex saw me making out with another girl. We broke up over 6 months ago. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a man came up to me and punched me in the face. He turned out to be the guy my ex-girlfriend cheated on me with. Apparently, she told him we broke up because I used to beat her. FML
Today, some girl punched me in the face and left a huge purple bruise. Apparently, her boyfriend has been cheating on her with me, because she always sees him walking me home. Her boyfriend is my older brother, who didn't bother telling her who I was, because he "wanted to see what she would do." FML
Today, my sister told me her ex-boyfriend abused her and I went to go confront him. Turns out, she lied because he dumped her after she cheated on him. I got my ass kicked. FML
Today, I tried to fight my girlfriend’s ex-boyfriend because she told me he used to beat her. Turns out, she was lying to “impress” me, and her ex has a black belt in taekwondo. I’m in excruciating pain right now. FML
Today, while I was out walking with my girlfriend, I got beaten up and called an "abuser" by a gang of women who noticed bruises on my girlfriend's arms and legs. The bruises are from her karate class. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 2 months decided to wrestle with my younger brother. He has gotten more action than I have. FML
Today, I tried to win back my ex by fighting her current boyfriend. He kicked my ass. Now I have a broken jaw and a court date. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML
Today, my ex boyfriend got into a physical fight with the guy I've been casually seeing for 9 months. Afterwards, they had a beer, a long chat, and decided this was my fault and I wasn't worth the drama. FML
Today, a guy beat the crap out of me for supposedly sleeping with his girlfriend. I didn't get a chance to tell him my brother lives with me and that he had the wrong guy. When my brother got home, he didn't ask if I was okay, but rather if the guy was coming back for him. FML
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Top comments
someguy945 0
That's nice, now call a lawyer and the police.
freedoggy77 0
ouch! your ex seems like the jealous type. oh and i know im gonna get killed, but 1st!
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Comments (216)
andreophile 0
#88, I logged in to recommend just that. Buy something sweet with 45 cal hollowpoints and shoot him in both the knees. Don't forget to lure him into a dark alley and wear a mask while you're at it. Good luck.
hotstuff81 0
You have a crazy ex obviously. Sue them you get money they get in trouble and can't do anything about you making out with another girl.
fxdxhk90 0
There are many possible solutions, however in order to maintain your dignity follow this advice. Get 3 or 4 of your strong friends, find that dude, and give him a lesson in manners.
Juliiaaa 0
daaaaaaang
RigChan 0
I hope you're okay. >___< But I really think you should sue, it's not acceptable that you're being attacked for no apparent reason. (I'm assuming that you and that ex no longer talk, and have had nothing to do with each other since you broke up..)
AdamGD 0
To everyone saying he is a pussy or whatever for not kicking the dude's ass, the OP got beat up BY the martial arts expert. OP is NOT THE MARTIAL ARTS EXPERT!! Learn to read assholes!!
ForceStrike64 0
Ouch. If I were you, I'd seriously consider barricading your house just in case she stalks you.
XXMeowmeowmeowXX 0
Seems like this older brother is a bit behind the times, eh?
katelynmarie 0
Sounds like you should put a hit on him. Lmao, just kidding. Don't get any ideas.
SookMauNoots 0
i live in alberta