Today, I found out that my mom doesn't know my phone number, but she does know the names of both of David Hasselhoff's daughters. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my stalker is my mom's new boyfriend. FML
Today, I found out that my contact name in my girlfriend's phone is "Dipshit McFucktard". FML
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML
Today, my mom called me by her favorite TV show character's name. Again. This is the eighth time this week. I'm an only child, and I'm 15. I thought she had my name down pat by now. FML
Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML
Today, I found out that my mum has been texting my ex-boyfriend to tell him what a dick he is. FML
Today, I found out that my mom uses my Facebook account more than I do. FML
Today, I found out my mom pretended to be me and had AIM conversations with my boyfriend. FML
Today, my phone rang for the first time in four days. It was my mom. She dialed the wrong number. FML
Today, it was my daughter's birthday. I didn't know I had a daughter. FML
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Top comments
OneLittleAdditio 9
So? My mom doesn't know my number either she just finds me on her contacts and clicks send. the magic of cell phones!
DjeePee 25
Here's a thought: maybe your mom is good in remembering names, and bad in remembering phone numbers. I am.
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Comments (76)
catatonicsleep 17
I don't know my own number never mind anyone else's! :D Some people are just bad at remembering numbers. Not really and FML since she probably has your number saved on her phone so doesn't need to remember it...
t_w_i_l_i_g_h_t 1
That's what I thought. I only *know* a few numbers. The rest, including my father's and my best friend's numbers, I just have saved in my phone. Because they're there, I don't really need to memorize them, which I was always bad at anyway.
sugarr0babby0 0
I have trouble remembering names..? /:
Zebidee 9
I agree with #13 - I know my own mobile number, but I've only moved recently, so I don't have my new landline number memorised. If I need it, it's in my phone, or written down on a piece of paper in my wallet.
brootalxkeni 0
so? memorizing numbers is so old school nowadays
Amgnowai 0
Agreed >_>
L3g4lPl4typus 0
quoth the raven "your moms a creep"
worldclass 0
This is dumb. At the mall there's a huge sign and it says "name 3 supermodels ... now name 3 of your child's teachers" It's normal apparently.
Fmlano 16
I couldn't name 3 supermodels.
ulicksam 0
With speed dial and name dial, very few people know other's phone numbers. Don't be an idiot.
rscanlan313 0
those 2 things dont even go together
W4X 0
Op even the FML above you complains about old people. I know how you feel.
aback 5
Count your blessings. Or are you pining away your weekends, longing for a call from Mommy?
DocBastard 40
Um...first off, you said "first of all," implying that you had more than one point. Secondly, you not only did not have a second point, but you instead quoted "Blue Swede," and C) stop smoking crack so early in the morning.
RedPillSucks 33
Your mom is playing the Jeopardy odds. One can easily imagine a Jeopardy question "Who is David Hasselhoff's daughter?" there wont be a question "What is my daughters phone number?" So do you want her to win $40,000 or not?