Animals: Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our... - FML

By btg - 06/02/2010 06:27 - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our dog. Sometimes she even makes her do tricks for them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 238

You deserved it 3 546

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Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

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Same thing different taste

By B'Dawk - 14/10/2018 13:30

Today, I found out my girlfriend has been putting boogers in my belly button when I don't pay attention to her while we watch tv. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 680

You deserved it 1 668

By jeesh - 31/01/2009 11:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend caught me picking my nose and eating the booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 957

You deserved it 89 284

By davincourt - 29/04/2012 18:31 - United States - Apollo Beach

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 252

You deserved it 2 998

Caught in 4K

By buggermonster - 16/06/2009 23:37 - United States

Today, while I was at my girlfriend's parents' house for dinner, and I thought no one was looking, I picked my nose and put it underneath my chair. Turns out she has a little brother who found it appropriate to point at me and scream, "Booger monster, Booger monster!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 728

You deserved it 76 820

By i fking love docb - 04/11/2012 21:16 - Virgin Islands, U.S. - Christiansted

Today, I watched my girlfriend slowly floss her teeth, and then eat what showed up on the floss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 768

You deserved it 3 336

By whattheheck - 04/06/2012 04:34 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 131

You deserved it 3 471

By HaleyIsabelle - 08/03/2010 20:54 - France

Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 449

You deserved it 3 710

By UUUGHHH - 05/02/2016 20:33 - France - Villejuif

Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth, and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 148

You deserved it 2 712

By Anonymous - 30/08/2015 00:06 - Canada - Newmarket

Today, I found dog poop in my room that had probably been there for days. My girlfriend, who was watching the house, said she didn't realize it was there, because she thought it was the smell of her own farts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 694

You deserved it 2 201

Psycho

By dating a psycho - 03/02/2022 08:00

Today, I learned that when my girlfriend was a kid, she enjoyed torturing animals for fun. Nice to know she was lying when she said the idea of harming an animal “makes her sick to her stomach.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 953

You deserved it 106

Next

Top comments

nicola1233 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 12:08

f your dogs life

Snow_Daisy 7

Saturday 6 February 2010 12:07

gross!

Comments

ilux3 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 23:18

WTF that's disgusting

braFTW 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 23:23

And, let me guess, your dog is one of those who wakes up the family by licking their mouths?.. =P

fruityrainbow86 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 23:37

hahahaha that is hilarious!! =D

malibucrazybabe 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 0:05

that's repulsive...

Ziggarot 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 0:16

maybe you should teach the dog a spacial trick too

Terwilliger 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 0:33

tbh, that's pretty funny.

depnation 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 0:34

thankfully she doesn't paste it under the table

pwned613 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 1:08

wow your girlfriend is sooo werid and nasty xD

V_S234 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 1:24

ick.... That made me gag :S

bubber 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 1:53

Everyone picks their nose. If you say you don't you are a liar. This is the first time I have ever heard of feeding them to a dog though. Pretty damn wierd, but not a dumpable offence. I am not sure what I would do in your situation.

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The Top

Today, I was scrolling through a more risqué/dark/dirty humor Facebook page. I thoughtlessly set my phone down to help my cousin with a translation for about a minute. When I went to grab my phone, I saw, front and center, a photo edit of Chewbacca with his "lipstick" out. No wonder she kept glancing down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69

You deserved it 415

Today, my wife told me that when she was actually pregnant with her ex's child; she was insatiably horny and always wanted sex. Too bad for me, because the current pregnancy has made her repulsed by any sexual contact. Thanks for telling me, I guess. FML

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You deserved it 220

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 14 759

You deserved it 2 219

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I agree, your life sucks 1 816

You deserved it 193

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I agree, your life sucks 536

You deserved it 106

Today, my dad has indoctrinated my boyfriend into anime. He'd never heard of anime before but now, as soon as he gets home from work, he and dad sit to watch episodes together while ignoring me. It’s gotten so bad I haven’t had sex in two weeks because my boyfriend comes to bed too late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 102

You deserved it 309

Today, I went to the public library for the first time ever. The librarian told me I couldn't get a library card because I had an outstanding balance of $130.00 from 1995. I was born in 1991. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 127

You deserved it 4 481

Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 349

You deserved it 10 394