By impure - 29/09/2014 16:48 - United States

Today, I found out I have an STD, courtesy of my girlfriend. Funnily enough, she was clean when we first started dating. FML
I agree, your life sucks 48 196
You deserved it 4 521

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Ouch.. Sorry Op! Time to get a new girl?

Why shouldn't you eat your girlfriend's peas? Because they are herpes


Ouch.. Sorry Op! Time to get a new girl?

LuckBeNimble 19

a faithful girl.... even tho that's a rarity nowadays

Preferably, no new girl, just dump current one. That way you get no bitch and you don't spread the STD

I hope it wasn't aids OP! Or some terrible life threatening STD. I agree that it's time for a new non-cheating gf.

headofmedusa 15

You don't just catch AIDS. You contract HIV. AIDS is the aftermath.

Well hopefully it's one of the curable STDs.

Faithful girls are a rarity nowadays? That's funny...

getting a new girl prolly isnt easy. hard enough to get a date without an std.

LuckBeNimble 19

63: why is that funny? it's statistically true. O:

It's funny because guys cheat more than girls.

#103 Men don't actually cheat more often then women, the levels are about even. Women usually just react a lot more explosively in most cases.

First of all 103 that is nothing more than an unsubstantiated opinion and by no means a fact. Also,the ratio of woman cheating to men cheating is more or less equal. Get actual facts before mouthing off on something you don't know.

can we just admit that both sexes are awful and that's why relationships are terrible


funny how you criticized #103 for stating an opinion by yet all you did was SAY your opinion was a fact. So any statement that doesn't agree with yours is automatically an opinion and your statements are always facts? Invalid much?

Read my comment again 124. I did not say my opinion was fact. I simply said that the ratio of men and woman cheating is more or less the same. No where did I say it is absolute. As for 103 they said, that it is funny that men cheat more than woman which implies that it is a fact. it is not a fact it is an opinion same as mine.

imbatmanfir 15

Faithful people are a rarity, not just girls

OP said she was clean when they started dating, and take note of that because it meant she was sleeping with someone else who had an STD.

Take into consideration that a lot of STD's can stay dormant for long periods of time. That being said it could've originated from you...

I think that op's girlfriend just cheated on him..

colton_colton 49

Taking into consider you're an idiot, I'm gonna go w/ the girl cheated on OP

At least I don't look like a gremlin, STD's are definitely something you'll never have to worry about.

You *say* you don't look like a gremlin, but we have no way of knowing. How can you diss someone over appearances when you don't even have a picture up?

@2, I think you meant that OP was asymptomatic. I'm also going to go with the girlfriend cheating. Most likely, OP would have gotten tested with his girlfriend and would have also been STD free.

I've always heard that if you have a cold sore (which is caused by the herpes virus) and perform oral sex then it can caused genital herpes? The girlfriend might not have cheated, or am I misinformed?

you can get herpes from oral. don't ever teach a sex end class.

@2: Not if OP and girlfriend have been together for like 5 years or something... Hence the FML. Pretty sure one of them would figure it out if infection occurred prior to that.

93, the question wasn't "can you get herpes from oral sex" it was "can you get genital herpes from a cold sore" and the answer to that is, in fact, no. Cold sores are caused by a different strain of the herpes virus and you cannot get genital herpes from that strain, nor can you get a cold sore on your genitals, so there's no need to worry if you/ your partner have a cold sore.

HSV1 can affect both the mouth and genitals.

Also keep in mind that you can catch some of dirty toilets.

I kinda hope this is sarcasm.. It's entirely untrue. You can't catch an STD from a toilet seat.

Actually, there are some that you can catch from indirect contact. Horrible to consider, but if a herpes sore is open and the fluid transfers to the seat and then to another persons skin....and herpes is just one possibility. Never say never. But those cases are rare, his girlfriend is probably just a ****.

not impossible, but extremely rare. you'd have to use the toilet immediately after someone infected had just used it, or at least that was what I heard from someone who should know this stuff

Well, you'd have to grind your gentials all over the toilet seat, just as previous, infected person who used the toilet. That's not exactly standart toilet behaviour.

LuckBeNimble 19

47: what do you mean that's not standard toilet behavior?!

martin8337 35

It jumped right up and grabbed the meat. Caught it from the toilet seat.

trina0626 3

not just toilet girls like to try on clothes before buying them swim suits and stuff like that. I was told u can get stuff from that to. I dont know how true it is but I just try to know my size buy it and wash it before wearing. I think everyone should. u know just in case.

what a cheating *****, leave her as fast as you can. im sorry op.

Hey, no need to come to conclusions, maybe she got chlamydia from a tractor seat.

well, shit it could also be from a door handle too :o

It could be from ANYTHING! So I think OP should stop jumping to conclusion and talk to his girlfriend

Someone always comments "*ex girlfriend" so I'll save you all the trouble

looks like your not the only boyfriend.

looks like you don't know the difference between your and you're

**** your life op. Oh wait, you have std's, never mind...

Why shouldn't you eat your girlfriend's peas? Because they are herpes

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
tony1891 22

now every time i have peas with a meal i will be thinking of this joke. epic!

Fun-ni-ly adverb In a strange or amusing way. So, yes. Funnily.