Today, I found my beloved hamster dead in her cage. Later that day, my boyfriend told me he already noticed that she was dead last night, but did not feel like telling me because he was afraid I wouldn't feel like doing it anymore that night. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my hamster died. It climbed out of its cage and jumped off my dresser. Looking for condolences, I told my mom who replied, "If I lived in your room, I would have done it earlier." FML
Today, I thought my hamster might be lonely, so I went to the pet shop and bought a new one to keep him company. The new hamster killed the old one. FML
Today, my mom wanted to surprise me by buying me a hamster. When I got into her car, I was actually surprised and even said, "Hi" to the hamster. When we got home, the hamster was dead. FML
Today, my last remaining pet, a hamster, died. Even he thinks it's better to drown in his water dish than brave the world living with me. FML
Today, I got back home and my hamster was dead. I left notes two weeks ago everywhere to remind my parents to feed it while I was overseas. Apparently, my parents even didn't realize I was gone. FML
Today, I put my hamster in his ball, and spent about an hour cleaning his cage. When I came back, I realized he wasn't even alive. FML
Today, I found a decomposing hamster deep in my closet. My daughter had hidden "Peach" after accidentally killing it and said it had ran away a month ago. And I'd believed her. FML
Today, I found out my creepy, obsessive neighbor got a pet hamster and named it after me. He has been telling all sorts of stories about his hamster using my name, and he just told me in detail how it died of heart attack. FML
Today, my cat died in the process of eating, and choking on, my hamster. FML
Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML
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Top comments
RedPillSucks 33
Sorry, I thought he had ****** the hamster to death or something for this to be in the intimacy section. Had to read it again to realize that he didn't want to be **** blocked.
Phustercluck 11
So sex is worth delaying your sorrow to him... It's one thing if this is an isolated moment of assholedom, but men who's actions are driven by their high value of sex could only lead to far worse situations of the same type. If you don't think it's that bad, pretend that instead of a pet hamster it's a pet dog or cat.
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Comments (41)
snakelady 3
LOl ditto #45 dump this selfish insensative bastard.
ClawingCreature 0
He's justified, but should have told you after you two were done that night. Nothing ***** up a man's night quite like something coming between him and his woman. Would have been the best of both worlds.
Cinn_fml 23
Actually, he should either have told her straight away, or never told her he noticed. At least that way it doesn't appear like all he cares about is getting some.
Kitties_Outcast 1
now say u won't do it ever again cuz of that...power lol jk
KaPeSh87 0
So are you 12? I'm sorry, but I legitimately can't think of anyone over the age of 12 that owns a hamster.
YourWetDream 0
Hi I'm Kevin! I'm 18 and have two hamsters....there now you can't say that ^ anymore :]
JayRoof 0
He shouldn't have told you. Total dumbass. Sorry about your hamster though :C
GRgoldfish 19
I see a break up in your future!
Kingbreezy04 10
He was pumping away " Don't look at the cage, don't you look at that damn cage". "Baby what is Hammy doing?" "Oh babe he's asleep, he doesn't want to watch us have sex."
MrPortalFan 21
Guess now you're not gonna do it for a week, huh?
GGitsNami 10
Haha well... Seems like he was right! At least he was honest? I would have just pretended I never noticed.
Sansational_ 18
"Doesn't matter, had sex."