Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I ordered a chicken sandwich. I was starving and it was the fastest thing to order. Half way through it, I found something which does not belong, and removed it. It was half a cockroach, and I don't know where the other half is. FML
Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML
Today, I was drinking lemon juice through a straw. After finishing half of the drink, I noticed there was a cockroach in my straw. FML
Today, I was stuck on the toilet with a huge stomachache after eating bad food the day before. I got up to flush when I noticed that there was a cockroach struggling feebly in the pile of crap. I'll never know if it got there before or after I crapped. FML
Today, I started my new job. I went to microwave food, only to discover roaches and ants crawling out of it. Now I am grossed out but still hungry. FML
Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML
Today, I ordered ramen to go. I looked at my order and discovered a cockroach. Disgusted, I showed it to them, and they apologized by "replacing" it for free. Later on, while I was enjoying the delicious food, I once again discovered a cockroach buried under all the noodles. FML
Today, I finally got some sleep after an exterminator came yesterday and took care of our roach problem. I woke up and kissed my boyfriend good morning. Frowning, he told me I had something stuck on the corner of my mouth. It was a roach leg. Where is the rest of the roach? FML
Today, I woke up, showered, and began brushing my teeth. When I started to brush my tongue I gagged, like usual, and threw up a little. What's unusual? I threw up a cockroach. FML
Today, I saw a cockroach on the ceiling. Immediately I got a stick to smack it down. When I hit it, it fell and landed in my mouth. Karma much? FML
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Top comments
Pleonasm 36
Did it come with a side order of Chicken Flied Lice, too? That would bug me.
worldclassrager 41
Oh good lord...that's disgusting... Hope you can get a refund....
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Comments (71)
weveallbeenthere 30
takeaway? should have given your takeaway back.
TXFernwoods 26
Is it possible to sue them? :o
kaytasha 18
Yes its definitely possible infact its a very viable option
CountWest 6
What OP experienced was a very disgusting experience, of course, but unless they actually got food poisoning or caught an illness it does not merit a lawsuit. Call for a health inspector, tell everyone about it and never go there again. But it is not advised to sue. Don't be THAT guy.
Brianna_Ray 23
This may be weird but I've never seen a roach in person before, only on tv. Finding one in my mouth is not how I want to first see one. FYL OP.
Nyx_fml 23
You are one lucky person. Roaches are gross.
coried91 28
I envy you. I moved into a place with a roach infestation. German roaches to be exact. They are extremely difficult to get rid of. It was the worst few weeks of my life.
asc2013 9
Agreed, but at least it wasn't alive when she spat it back out.
Lilxpie 18
I was at school being bored one day and I pressed the 6 key three times. A cockroach came out from under the keyboard. Satan has therefore invented cockroaches.
Brianna_Ray 23
I hope I never see any. I remember having to watch a nature show In high school and during an episode a bat fell to the ground while sleeping and they ate it alive. That scene scarred me for life.
grgnyce 8
Free extra protein....sorry OP!!
coried91 28
This FML is making me sick to my stomach!
DorklyComicFan 8
I cringed after reading that. Brush your teeth/tongue multiple times tonight.
Honema 16
Right now*
zwhite2712 12
Bear Grylls, "There is a takeaway in my roaches."
jayleensmama 14
I'll probably get down voted into oblivion, but what's takeaway? Takeout?
psycheiris13 20
Yup!
Peachy2392 26
I think OP is referring to the left over food they brought home. Different people call it different things.
guineagirl96 38
I had the same question
jadeystram 3
No it's exactly the same as "takeout" instead of out it's away.
psycheiris13 20
How did you not realize that you were putting a roach in your mouth! Not your fault it was in there though. I'd report them
rachelann21 9
Oh that's just nasty
Justyna1123 4
Some people eat those! So it's not that bad....
smokecloud_ 37
That's horrific.