Anonymous
Richland, United States
Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Bern, Switzerland
Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML
Pottymouth
United States
Today, I was having really bad diarrhea. I sat down on the toilet and heard a plop, thinking it was just me going to the bathroom. After I was finished, I look in the toilet to see my iPhone sitting in a pool of diarrhea. FML
phoneless
Jordan
Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML
breakinphones
United States
Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML
yosmurf
Smooth.
Today, I finished taking a huge dump at the public restroom at the mall. When I got up to wipe, my wrist clipped my butt and knocked my brand new Apple Watch into the toilet. FML
Kris
United States
Today, I found my iPhone. Too bad it was when I was getting my clothes out of the washer. FML
Anonymous
India
Today, I left my brand new iPhone on the counter, and went to get its cleaning cloth. My grandmother saw a mosquito, and used my iPhone as a fly swatter. I now have a broken iPhone. Good news though: no more mosquito. FML
ryanharp2
Conway, United States
Today, my iPhone got back from being fixed. When I opened the box there was a note attached to my phone that said, "All you had to do was turn it on." FML
Paige
United States
Today, my parents gave me an iPhone. They then checked my grades online, and promptly took it away. FML
thesadone
United States
Today, I realized that the best and most entertaining part of my 3 day mini vacation was realizing my nipples work on the touch screen of my iPhone. FML
Top comments
Psych101 9
"I fell on it?"
LlamaUprising 10
Classy.
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Comments (419)
miroslavracer 0
I wonder if he bars and if so was it on vibrant
skyeyez9 25
I need to ask my friend who is an ER doctor if she has any crazy patient stories. She has been saying lately, people have been coming in with horrid burns (meth lab). They lie and say shit like they were mowing the lawn (at 2am) and the mower exploded.
IndigoFuckYou 9
DocBastard? Is that you?
bbgman 4
I hear the iPhone 5 is pretty shitty anyway... Ba Dum Tssss
mesax2 1
ET was just trying to phone home to Uranus
ryggsekk 8
hey this doctor is breaking the law, he isn't allowed to talk about patients. he's a world class douche. but i might be wrong
Shrike 24
Yeah, you're wrong, as well as the real douche here. How about you hold off on insulting people until you make sure it's actually justified? No personal details = no HIPAA violation.
softpaws 17
You are wrong. As long as this doctor doesnt give any personal information or names, its fine.
jaycooter 0
How is the Dr breaking the law? If no names or personal identifying information are provided then it's not a ethical violation. Are you a Supreme Court Justice able to change laws. LOL
ohrlly7457 7
So thats where they make the rown ones
RaindrewxRomance 7
"I fell on it?"
cwlovell13 3
FAKE. A doctor would be able to afford an iPhone 5...
answeryourphone 3
How did it get there