Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML
Today, I was having really bad diarrhea. I sat down on the toilet and heard a plop, thinking it was just me going to the bathroom. After I was finished, I look in the toilet to see my iPhone sitting in a pool of diarrhea. FML
Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML
Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML
Smooth.
Today, I finished taking a huge dump at the public restroom at the mall. When I got up to wipe, my wrist clipped my butt and knocked my brand new Apple Watch into the toilet. FML
Today, I found my iPhone. Too bad it was when I was getting my clothes out of the washer. FML
Today, I left my brand new iPhone on the counter, and went to get its cleaning cloth. My grandmother saw a mosquito, and used my iPhone as a fly swatter. I now have a broken iPhone. Good news though: no more mosquito. FML
Today, my iPhone got back from being fixed. When I opened the box there was a note attached to my phone that said, "All you had to do was turn it on." FML
Today, my parents gave me an iPhone. They then checked my grades online, and promptly took it away. FML
Today, I realized that the best and most entertaining part of my 3 day mini vacation was realizing my nipples work on the touch screen of my iPhone. FML
Top comments
Psych101 9
"I fell on it?"
LlamaUprising 10
Classy.
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Comments (419)
steven84_fml 4
Any missed calls?
TurtleSmile 14
Must have got some pretty crappy reception.
_krystallynn_ 11
punny lol
Token780 3
Is there an App for that?
BntyHntrSeattle 30
You should email Apple about what happened; they're always striving for innovation with their devices.
Eternal94 10
This remain me of an old FLM about the iPhone in someone daughter ******
JAB2010 1
Reminds me of that x-ray I found online of a dude with a potato AND jelly jar stuck up there. I just don't get the fascination with that orifice.
kikimonole 13
Well that's a shitty situation. Pardon the bad pun. Sorry, OP. Some people just have this weird obsession with things going up their bungholio.
FightingCanuck 2
It's literally "the shit"
mrbobmarley4 8
Was I the only one that thought Doc Bastard wrote this?
White_like_dat 3
Still better than a Samsung Galaxy S3....