Anonymous
Richland, United States
Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Bern, Switzerland
Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML
Pottymouth
United States
Today, I was having really bad diarrhea. I sat down on the toilet and heard a plop, thinking it was just me going to the bathroom. After I was finished, I look in the toilet to see my iPhone sitting in a pool of diarrhea. FML
phoneless
Jordan
Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML
breakinphones
United States
Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML
yosmurf
Smooth.
Today, I finished taking a huge dump at the public restroom at the mall. When I got up to wipe, my wrist clipped my butt and knocked my brand new Apple Watch into the toilet. FML
Kris
United States
Today, I found my iPhone. Too bad it was when I was getting my clothes out of the washer. FML
Anonymous
India
Today, I left my brand new iPhone on the counter, and went to get its cleaning cloth. My grandmother saw a mosquito, and used my iPhone as a fly swatter. I now have a broken iPhone. Good news though: no more mosquito. FML
ryanharp2
Conway, United States
Today, my iPhone got back from being fixed. When I opened the box there was a note attached to my phone that said, "All you had to do was turn it on." FML
Paige
United States
Today, my parents gave me an iPhone. They then checked my grades online, and promptly took it away. FML
thesadone
United States
Today, I realized that the best and most entertaining part of my 3 day mini vacation was realizing my nipples work on the touch screen of my iPhone. FML
Top comments
Psych101 9
"I fell on it?"
LlamaUprising 10
Classy.
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Comments (419)
batrob 7
Finders keepers doesn't apply in this situation right?
slickchrome 11
People don't use phones to call people anymore?
jemmers 13
Anyone else wondering if this is DocBastard?
KiddNYC1O 22
You guys should really read the comments before posting predictable stuff.
teh_uber_muffin 3
Is the Op Docbastard?
olpally 33
No!!! Read the comments above!!
lilmisslivid 0
Did someone say for him to shove it out his ass and he literally did? Well more in but still why would anyone......people are WEIRD!
silvernights21 10
I will patiently wait for the fml from the patients perspective, because there is no way you get a phone shoved up your ass, and still have a positive outlook on your life.
cwlovell13 3
Maybe the patient enjoyed it... HAve you not heard any of the gerbil stories?
DocBastard 40
I bet I didn't.
jaycooter 0
Was SIRI vibrating? I think I will try this tonight LMFAO!!!!!
honeybadgerDG2S 2
That's an fml for him not you
Austyn57 1
was he related to the girl that had it up her ****** lol