Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML
Today, I was having really bad diarrhea. I sat down on the toilet and heard a plop, thinking it was just me going to the bathroom. After I was finished, I look in the toilet to see my iPhone sitting in a pool of diarrhea. FML
Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML
Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML
Smooth.
Today, I finished taking a huge dump at the public restroom at the mall. When I got up to wipe, my wrist clipped my butt and knocked my brand new Apple Watch into the toilet. FML
Today, I found my iPhone. Too bad it was when I was getting my clothes out of the washer. FML
Today, I left my brand new iPhone on the counter, and went to get its cleaning cloth. My grandmother saw a mosquito, and used my iPhone as a fly swatter. I now have a broken iPhone. Good news though: no more mosquito. FML
Today, my iPhone got back from being fixed. When I opened the box there was a note attached to my phone that said, "All you had to do was turn it on." FML
Today, my parents gave me an iPhone. They then checked my grades online, and promptly took it away. FML
Today, I realized that the best and most entertaining part of my 3 day mini vacation was realizing my nipples work on the touch screen of my iPhone. FML
Top comments
Psych101 9
"I fell on it?"
LlamaUprising 10
Classy.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (419)
perdix 31
Look, when you annoy Siri with too many dumb questions, you shouldn't listen to what she tells you to do. As a physician, you may want to hit the "Report a problem" button on the Maps app. Looks like the turn-by-turn directions were kind of *lowers sunglasses* shitty.
olpally 33
Is there an app for that? Edit:: someone beat me to it... Fml D:
shireman97 6
Is that what the new charger is all about
zhatred67 5
Maybe they downloaded the vibrator app 0_0
courtz94 24
This is gross. Sorry OP.
sharksfan48 13
I used to wonder why people got iPhones. Now I understand.
ryggsekk 8
was it set on vibrate :)
TheTallPerson 3
My question to the patient would be, "why?"
cynical4life 4
Brings a whole new meaning to having your phone "up ur ass" all the time
unknown_user5566 27
That's a saying?
cynical4life 4
Yes
ElishaisSexy2016 9
What!?!? Lol
jah9708 0
Heyyyyy ur cute!!!