By Yikes - 27/09/2016 04:34 - United States - Cumberland

Today, I finally found the single flaw in my perfect boyfriend. It's herpes. Genital herpes. FML
I agree, your life sucks 16 953
You deserved it 1 723

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Don't worry OP, it herpes. I mean happens. I'm on my way out.

No human being is perfect, there's always something, not usually an unsightly and painful STD, but something.. Hope you get yourself checked out/taken care of OP.


Could be worse at least but you'll get through it

I'm guessing you don't know much about genital herpes. You get that shit for life

It actually could be worse, though. One of my really good friends got genital herpes via oral sex. She got type 1 which is generally referred to as cold sore herpes, which about 80% of the population has. She only has to worry about being active during an outbreak, which she rarely gets. That being said though, herpes can be spread without any sign of an outbreak. But if someone has type 1 on the genital area and has sex wth someone who has it on their mouth, it's not that likely they'll get it in the genitals as well. I could be wrong though, someone correct me if I am. Even if she doesn't has type 1, type 2 isn't that far different. There are WAY worse STDs out there, I'm just trying to let OP see the silver lining. That being said, OP. I am very sorry this happened to you. I hope you had a serious talk with your boyfriend. Also please please PLEASE do not talk negative towards yourself. My friend felt super dirty after she was first diagnosed and her self esteem plummeted. Just because you have an STD it does not define you or make you disgusting.

Herpes really isn't a big deal. Adam Ruins Everything does an episode on it and explains why Herpes doesn't matter.

I'm not talking about the actual condition getting worse I'm just saying that the situation could be worse. The perfect boyfriend could actually be a serial killer or something worse than having herpes. I know it's bad but it could be worse.

ChiefKoala 30

Okay so. I have the cold sore herpes too. And I didn't even have oral sex. I, believe it or not, got it drinking after my mom when she had outbreaks even though my mom strongly warned against me. That's what i get for sneaking gulps of her coke while she wasn't looking. But seriously OP, if you do get diagnosed with it, don't beat yourself up over it. I feel nasty sometimes, even still. And yes, you do get it for life, but at least it would be that and not Chlamydia or something. Though, if you haven't already, i would get him and you tested for any others too, so if he DID have something else you can catch it early. Best of luck OP, and know you're not alone (obviously.)

Burton_Forever 23

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acerredrum 23

Wrong, Herpes is forever but it is the only STD that can't kill you. 80% of the population has oral herpes and 25% genital herpes. A great deal of people have it and don't even know they have it because they have no symptoms or the symptoms are mild enough that they think that they have razor burn.

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rldostie 19

#47--Actually their assertion/numbers aren't off at all. Are you not aware that there are two different strains of herpes? Most people have type 1, which is nothing more than cold sores. 1 in 4 have type 2, which is in the genital region. I've heard it's said that the number for genital herpes could be even higher because people can have it and never know, never have an outbreak, or have such mild outbreaks that they aren't aware of it. It's a scary thought but there certainly are worst things out there.

Their maths is fine. Obviously a certain amount of the population is lucky enough to have both strains

acerredrum 23

#47, you seem to be under the impression that people cannot have both oral and genital herpes. Guess what? Some people do. And yes, most people do have herpes, about 90% of them do, if you think I'm wrong you're welcome to fact check me.

I never said people couldn't have both. I simply misinterpreted your comment. You don't need to be so pretentious about it.

48, I simply misread the comment and therefore misunderstood the point they were trying to make. I apologize if my initial comment seemed rude. I didn't intend it to.

acerredrum 23

When you are correcting someone you should make sure you understand what they are saying though. If I seemed snippy I'm sorry but being told to dial back my estimations when you didn't even understand what I was talking about is more than a little frustrating.

I already acknowledged that I made a mistake and apologized. Not sure what more you want me to say.

Also the point was not that I didn't understand. I don't appreciate you insulting my intelligence by saying I "didn't understand" what you were saying. It's not as though your point was complicated. I'm sure most people can "understand" it. I'm human. Humans make mistakes, and in this case my mistake was reading the comment wrong. That does not equate to not understanding the concept you were putting forth. I admit I should have read more carefully. But I will not accept being implied to be stupid just because I misread something.

acerredrum 23

I wasn't aware saying something was misunderstood was an insult now? You didn't understand it, I didn't say it was it was complex it was because you, by your own admission, read it incorrectly. Also please point out where you apologized because all you did was defend your mistake and call me pretentious. I suppose if 'you didn't understand' now is calling someone stupid I guess callings someone 'pretentious' can now be considered an apology.

I said in my reply to 48 that I was sorry if my initial comment seemed rude. It isn't my fault you only pay attention to your own comments. And you seem to like ignoring the fact that it was the way you said it that made it come off insulting. The way you word things has an effect on how they come across, and your wording was rather condescending. But you seem determined to ignore your own faults, so have at it.

I did acknowledge my mistake, and admitted I should have read your comment more carefully. Not sure how you missed that, but then again, you don't seem to actually read what I'm saying, either. You're too hung up on the fact that I pissed you off to care what I say beyond that point. So just so you're able to see it clearly, I admit I read too fast and responded before processing the information. That was my fault, and I accept that. I'm sorry I pissed you off and called you pretentious. I admit that I got a little snippy. That aside, you haven't exactly been pleasant to me, either. If you're going to ask for apologies, you should be willing to give them and accept your own mistakes, as well.

#36 Herpes can be fatal. It's only in a very small number of cases, but it's something to be aware of. Newborns and people who are immunocompromised, can get very sick or die. While most people are fine, and has little impact on their life, people still need to be aware that they need to be careful, inform any partners they have it before sex and let your Dr know if you are having an outbreak while you are ill or about to give birth.

acerredrum 23

Wait, so you apologized to someone ELSE and expect me to accept it? Ha no. Also I did apologize for being snippy, which is also the only thing I feel like I should have apologized for. and would like to point out that sending me a private message and then blocking me so I can't respond is childish as ****.

Not sure what you're talking about. I don't bother blocking people on here. There's no point in it.

Like anyone would believe you after your fit, anyway

OJ, is he your new bf or are you already a couple for a bit longer? If he's your new bf, maybe you both should have get tests before having sex unprotected...

You get herpes by skin contact, not fluids. So being safe you can still get the virus.

Now you know the hard way that there's no such thing as perfect... FYL op

No human being is perfect, there's always something, not usually an unsightly and painful STD, but something.. Hope you get yourself checked out/taken care of OP.

Not necessarily. They could be a new couple and maybe he didn't have any previous outbreaks.

How do you know he lied? She never indicated they have had sex before and a person doesn't just go advertising that they have herpes to every person they meet. Perhaps they just reached that point in the relationship where he felt it necessary to tell her.

it's possible that the boyfriend didn't even know he had herpes. can't really lie about something you don't know about. it's possible (if op has it) that the op caught it from a previous partner and recently broke out and assumed the boyfriend gave it to them. there's a lot of possibilities, unless op explains further.

Most men don't even know they have genital herpes. It's doesn't have that many symptoms for them as it does for women, so it doesn't mean he necessarily knew

Don't worry OP, it herpes. I mean happens. I'm on my way out.

90% of the worlds population has the herpes virus. OP probably had it already anyways.

Is like to ask where you got that information

i hope you found out because it was getting serious and he told you. and not that you found out by contracting them as well.

neuronerd 28

It depends on if you see yourself with him in the long run. If so, wait to have sex until you're really sure about staying with him. If he takes medication to supress outbreaks and you use condoms (they don't completely protect against herpes, but they help), there's a good chance you may never get it from him. I have friends who have been married for several years, one of them has herpes from a previous partner, but the other has never caught it. It is a manageable situation, but also a big decision. There is always the risk of getting it yourself.

That's right! Take it like James Bond! The names, Herpes. Genital...Herpes.