Intimacy: Today, I faked back pain to get out of sex with my wife. FML - FML

By hjkashld - 24/04/2012 01:48 - United States

Spicy

Today, I faked back pain to get out of sex with my wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 528

You deserved it 36 489

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By biggieT - 14/06/2012 02:21 - Sri Lanka - Colombo

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my wife, when she fell asleep. She then woke up and started moaning, clearly faking an orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 061

You deserved it 7 587

I suck

By Anonymous - 18/02/2023 12:00

Today, I sucked so bad that I faked an injury during a football game to get out of playing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 620

By virgo - 30/01/2010 06:50 - France

Spicy

Today, I had to lie to my therapist about my sex life to make me feel better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 228

You deserved it 6 546

By hnickell93 - 10/12/2012 18:37 - United States - Visalia

Spicy

Today, I realized that sex with my husband has gotten so boring that I'd rather fake an orgasm than let him continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 844

You deserved it 12 838

By blarghhhh - 28/02/2016 14:58 - United States - Owosso

Today, I woke up with the flu. My wife thinks I'm faking it so we don't have to go on date night, even though I've been on the toilet all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 049

You deserved it 1 374

By k8thagr8 - 01/03/2015 02:47 - United States - Virginia Beach

Spicy

Today, I slipped on some ice and wrecked my back. When my husband and I went to go to bed, he begged me to take one of the pain pills left over from his recent surgery. Not so I could feel better and get some rest, but so he could have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 239

You deserved it 3 966

By shouldabeenapornstar - 17/03/2010 15:46 - United States

Spicy

Today, I decided to fake it when my husband and I were making love. Afterwards, he told me that he could tell my head was "really in the game" and felt a stronger connection with me now and was glad I opened up and "let go" with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 231

You deserved it 40 417

By Anonymous - 18/01/2014 22:55 - United States - Somerset

Spicy

Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very serious, so I told her to stop faking it. She responded, "Wanna know what I actually fake? My orgasms." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 658

You deserved it 64 542

Ouchie

By Anonymous - 17/12/2014 20:09 - United States

Spicy

Today, I felt a horrible pain while having sex with my wife, and I had to stop. I thought it was a hernia or something, but she called me a liar and accused me of everything from not finding her attractive, to me cheating on her. It turned out I had appendicitis. She still won't apologize. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 480

You deserved it 3 043

Deception

By Anonymous - 08/03/2021 01:59

Today, I found out my husband was faking his leg injury. I caught him out and about walking just fine, hand in hand with another woman. I’ve been caring for him, holding down the bills, and taking him to an "at home" chiropractor for the past 7 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 588

You deserved it 80

Next

Top comments

kzxvazure 0

Tuesday 24 April 2012 7:27

just say no....

HSOMGF 5

Tuesday 24 April 2012 7:33

That back pain is probably related to your lack of spine. And really, **** HER life. She deserves better.

Comments

MDTeddy 13

Tuesday 24 April 2012 11:18

You rubbed one before hand didn't you?

PYLrulz 17

Tuesday 24 April 2012 11:56

Al Bundy?!?

MigraineurOfLife 15

Tuesday 24 April 2012 15:08

Awww... Peg! ~shakes his head~ Not again!

Loly19 8

Tuesday 24 April 2012 12:15

If she's not getting it from you, she'll gonna get it elsewhere, so... Talk or man up

I_Punch_Babies 7

Tuesday 24 April 2012 12:38

doesnt matter had abstinence

BecomeMine 0

Tuesday 24 April 2012 13:17

Woah, Woah, Woah you didn't want to have sex, weird since that's what all my ex- boyfriends thought about.....

bigdog57_fml 9

Tuesday 24 April 2012 13:22

Doesn't matter I had sex

williamcarter93 13

Tuesday 24 April 2012 13:27

tell her no. And I wouldn't say she deserves better, either. Men and Women do that. Yes, it's dumb, but to end a marriage over that is stupid. No wonder relationships don't last long now anymore.

williamcarter93 13

Tuesday 24 April 2012 13:28

you never met any, then. Men aren't all the sex fiends the media portrays them as.

jaytee1994 9

Tuesday 24 April 2012 13:30

Wow. Is she that horrible?? Dude that sucks for you

williamcarter93 13

Tuesday 24 April 2012 13:30

we ain't. Not by a hell of a long shot.

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 40 049

You deserved it 4 457

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You deserved it 5 266

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You deserved it 6 560

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I agree, your life sucks 50 876

You deserved it 3 475

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I agree, your life sucks 37 884

You deserved it 91 004

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for another guy. Last week, she wrote sweet things like "Love you forever" and "Light of my life" on my arm cast. I have to wait two more weeks until it's taken off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 024

You deserved it 3 914

Today, I sat through an incredibly long and tedious class lecture. Just as my professor was nearing the end of his lecture, the resident stoner loudly yawned and asked what we'd been talking about for the past hour. We got to hear most of the lecture all over again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 009

You deserved it 2 414